If young adults are educated before and throughout the marriage process, relationship deterioration can be prevented in the long run.

Marriage is a common and significant life event that has serious ramifications for prosperity. Since it is a more complex phenomenon than it looks, a significant percentage of marriages end with a divorce. Even though, recent statistics show that divorce rates are going down in the United States, this is due to the fact that young couples, unfortunately, are no longer taking the oath of commitment, resulting in distorted familial structures in our society. To combat this issue, scholars have put forth premarital education programs that dramatically contribute to healthy marriages and decrease the likelihood of divorce. Researchers report that “premarital education is significantly correlated with higher levels of marital quality, lower levels of marital conflict, and lower divorce rates” (Doss, Rhoades, Stanley, 2009).

As mentioned, spending a life with a stranger, and more importantly, cooperating with him or her to fulfill the promise of being a human is a much more complex task than it looks. Individuals take on much longer preparations for far simpler undertakings, such as getting a driver’s license or taking a college test. Thus, it is only fitting that couples seek premarital counseling before stepping into one of the more intricate roles in their life. One of the documented benefits of these premarital education programs is improving partners’ communication skills. Most of the marital problems stem from lack of awareness between couples, which can be improved with better communication. Because communication is a soft skill, it is often taken for granted and individuals do not take time to fine tune their communication skills. Pre-marital education programs partly focus on couple’s ability to communicate. When each partner is aware of the other’s needs and character, communication improves. According to a recent study analyzing 23 studies on the effectiveness of premarital counseling over the past 30 years, couples receiving counseling scored 30 percent higher on tests that rated communication effectiveness and marriage satisfaction (Carroll and Doherty 2003).

Based on the existent literature, the ultimate goal of premarital education is to guide youth and adults before they decide on marrying someone. That is, once a person contemplates on the idea of marriage and before deciding on the candidate, he or she should start meeting with a counselor. The completion of the education program will further help candidates in shaping their thoughts about the necessary commitments for a considerate marriage. Young people should consider both their hearts and minds when seeking a life partner. The individual’s choice of partner’s values is crucial to know and to take into consideration in this important decision process. Also, counseling could certainly enhance the characteristics needed in the marriage such as trust, loyalty, and faithfulness.

Another benefit of premarital counseling education is that individuals gain a better understanding of how to deal with conflicts that will inevitably occur in a marriage. For instance, economic and emotional difficulties are often probable and cause problems for couples. If young adults are educated beforehand and throughout the marriage process, relationship deterioration can be prevented in the long run.

Religious perspectives on marriage

From a religious perspective, marriage could be seen as one of the most important stages in a person’s life. For instance, many Muslims believe that marriage is essential and a strong tradition of the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him). Some even say that “marriage is half the religion” (Maqsood, 2000).

The value of marriage is emphasized in the Qur’an as follows: “And among His signs is this, that He created for you mates from among yourselves, that you may dwell in peace and tranquility with them, and He has put love and mercy between your (hearts): Verily in that are signs for those who reflect” (Qur’an 30:21). In this divine remark, not only is the power of marriage highlighted, but so is the equality of humans. In order to have a peaceful marriage, both partners need to be aware that they are created from the same source, and each partner has their own responsibilities to build a long-term union. Thus, verses in the Qur’an, and the main principles signified in other Holy Books, provide a foundation for prosperous marriages. The Bible also reflects the value of marriage in the following verse: “That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh” (Genesis 2:24).

Different forms of premarital counseling

There are many approaches to premarital education, but as Madison and Madison (2003) mention in their research, good premarital education should include 16 levels: life style expectations, friends and interests, personality match, communication, personal issues, religion/spirituality/values, problem solving, parenting, sexuality, extended family, financial issues, readiness, covenant/commitment, key problem indicators, families of origin, and dual careers.

The Prevention and Relationship Enhancement Program and Relationship Evaluation Questionnaire is a great example of a resource that helps enable partners to carry out successful marriages (PREP; Stanley et al. 1999). The authors surveyed 400 churches about marriage preparation. The counselor meets the clients privately and applied four personality scales which included assertiveness, self-confidence, avoidance, and dominance. Participants in this study also answered questions regarding the quality of their parents’ marriages. The results showed that conflicted couples are reported to have the highest divorce rate (Fowers et al. 1996).

In another study, couples completed the PREPARE assessment and ended up with greater improvement in relationship satisfaction (Druckman et. al. 1979). The studies all show that couples who applied their skills learned in premarital counseling had healthier marriages. As a result, educated couples experience less issues with miscommunication and are also not as prone to divorce.

The selected studies provide three important implications for counselors to emphasize in premarital programs. Accompanied with these programs, couples are given the opportunity to improve the communication skills necessary in problem solving, working as a team, and learning to forgive one another. Men and women could also bring these communication skills to their daily lives. Such programs can also help participants focus on the ultimate purpose of marriage. Often times, especially in the modern era, young people marry for purely physical reasons. But physical considerations alone are not sufficient to sustain a long lasting, healthy relationship. And, the ultimate purpose of marriage should be helping each other to fulfill the ultimate purpose of life, which is connecting with the Creator, knowing and worshiping Him. In conclusion, couples need to dedicate themselves to work together as a team, and work on the important milestones to strengthen their marriage. Comprehensive premarital counseling can help prepare them to do this work.

References

• Carroll, J. S. and Doherty, W. J. (2003), Evaluating the Effectiveness of Premarital Prevention Programs: A Meta-Analytic Review of Outcome Research. Family Relations, 52: 105–118.
• Druckman J. M., Fournier, D. G., Robinson, B., & Olson, D. H. (1979). Effectiveness of five    types of premarital preparation programs. St. Paul, MN: Family Social Science, University of Minnesota.
• Doss, B. D., Rhoades, G. K., Stanley, S. M., Markman, H. J., & Johnson, C. A. (2009) Differential use of premarital education in first and second marriages. Journal of Family Psychology,23, 268-273.
• Fowers, B. J., Montel, K. H., & Olson, D. H. (1996). Predicting marital success for premarital couple types based on PREPARE. Journal of Marital & Family Therapy, 22(1), 103-119.
• Genesis 2:24
• Madison, James K. and Lynda S. Madison, (2013). A review of Research-Based Interventions on Marriage Preparation. NY, 2013
• Maqsood, R. W. (2000). The Muslim marriage guide. Beltsville, MD:Amana Publications.
• Quran, 30:21.
• Stanley, S. M., Bloomberg, S. L., & Markman, H. J. (1999). Helping couples fight for their    marriages: The PREP approach. In M. T. Hannah (Ed.). Preventive approaches in couples therapy (pp. 279-303). Philadelphia, PA, US: Brunner/Mazel.

While Fethullah Gulen is revered by many for his authority as a scholar and for his achievements in education and intercultural dialogue, his views on language should earn him equal renown as a philosopher of language. Linguistics offers an analysis of a language’s system – its structure, sounds, grammar, and semantics – but the philosophy of language describes the way language creates meaning. Gulen is anchored in the optimistic tradition of the philosophy of language that establishes the relationship between language, belief, truth, and the meaning of life.

Gulen draws insights on the nature of language from the Qur’an. For Gulen, God has created with a purpose; such is also true of language. He echoes the Qur’an in this sense, in which glad tidings of paradise are given to believers who, “will hear therein neither vain talk nor falsehood” (78:35). In Gulen’s writings there is always a conscious effort to awaken in his audience an awareness of our relationship to God and of our duties towards humanity and the world.

He writes that his concept of “speech” is an effort to expound on the following verse in the Qur’an: “The All-Merciful. He has taught the Qur’an. He has created the human. He has taught him speech” (Rahman 55:1–4). In his book Speech and Power of Expression, Gulen writes, “In creating humankind, the Most Merciful gave us the ability to speak of the human essence, our inner depths, the entire cosmos, and the truth beyond material existence before sending us to the dimension of external existence” (p. 1)

The “Referential paradigm of language” that was an offshoot of Positivism’s exclusive reliance upon rationalism and science looks at language as an empirical object of investigation only and limits meaning to the word-object relation only, reducing reality to mere physical phenomenon that can be quantitatively measured and explained (Medina, 2005:40). However, Gulen writes that language is not only a tool for describing facts and performing vocative functions – it also defines and constitutes our humanity. It “gives voice to our thoughts, it is the rhythm of our feelings, and the excitement of our hearts; it is the interpreter in our communication with God Almighty. Language is a reflection of the Divine Archetype and is the repository of divine knowledge. By virtue of the faculty of language, humankind has been elevated to the rank of vicegerent on this earth” (p. 8).

In this sense, Gulen argues that language not only reveals and expresses the Divine and the Transcendental; it can also establish a relation between the Creator and the created. Gulen writes, “It is through speech that human beings have become the addressee of God and it is thanks to this faculty that they can address Him” (p. 1).

This constructive and creative view of language is a counter to the extreme form of postmodern philosophy of language that presents a pessimistic view of language, denies the divine origin of language, and reduces language to empty signs and elusive images – turns it into chimeras unanchored in any reality or purpose or meaning. This reductive view of language that looks at texts as auto-referential only turns language into a closed system of self-referring signs that endlessly defer meaning. The result is nihilism, solipsism, and the coarsening of the values that define our humanity. Virtues like duty, love, sacrifice, and the idea of the sacred are dismissed as mere linguistic projections.

Gulen, on the other hand, presents an optimistic view of language and writes, “By means of the faculty of speech bestowed in our nature, the facility has been afforded for humans to express and interpret everything at their discretion… Speech is an instrument by way of which truth is acknowledged as the highest reality and all beings become a musical instrument as if in a symphony, thereby removing the veil over things, enabling them to express themselves” (p. 2).

The “Luciferan thrust” of Postmodernism dismisses the ideals of beauty, sacredness, duty, sacrifice, the truth of the heart, and virtue as mere flattering words that mask and hide selfish motives. Freud dismissed the idea of the sacred as “infantile fantasy,” the hangover of the primitive mind, and Karl Marx described religion as the opiate for the masses. The result is a shuddering collapse of all the values that define our humanity, reducing the universe to a “Wasteland,” a “Flatland” inhabited by alienated, depressed “hollow men” who can “connect nothing with nothing.”

But Gulen does not look at beautiful language as mere simulacrum, as empty of meaning. In his account, language is “one of the most precious of gifts” from God, and words are underpinned by ideas and values. Language can inculcate moral values. There is a relationship between language, belief, meaning, and understanding. Language nourishes our aspirations, which arise from “our distinctive foundational essence”; language lends a wing “to our ideals” and takes “their feet off the ground to the heavens”; lifting us to “the upper reaches of a spiritual ascension and preparing for us thrones in realms beyond the material world.” Gulen repeatedly highlights the higher spiritual function of language. He says, “Responding to our desire for eternity, speech enriches our feelings in an indescribable manner and gives our souls a depth that cannot be bound by the dimensions of corporeality” (p. 7-8).

The reductive and degrading views of human nature put forth by the pseudo prophets of modernity, who define the essence of humanity in terms of libido, monetary profit, or class struggle, cannot explain how good literature stirs the soul and uplifts the heart. According to Gulen, literature that wells from, and voices what is in, our hearts will always remind us of the Divinity that was breathed into human beings and forms the quintessence of humanity. The constructive use of language is like “a strong gust” of wind that lifts people up “in the sky where kites wander,” “and they enjoy the freedom and ease of a bird taking wing in the spacious sky…they experience constant transformations and perceive the magnificence of transcendent life through the colorful dimensions of speech…” (p. 6).

Gulen cites the Holy Qur’an as an excellent example of the zenith of language that has an immense depth of meaning, and whose “voice is heard beyond ramparts and echoes in even the most obstinate and bigoted of hearts. There is such dazzling magic in the presentation of its themes that it is impossible not to be impressed upon hearing it.”

According to Gulen, language that embeds lofty ideals and noble goals “is as expansive as the skies, as full of vigor as the earth, as lustrous as silk, and as comforting as a mother’s embrace. It articulates to us the glory of our faith, the riches of our society, the purity and integrity of our fellow companions, the struggle of our ancestors, and our values that make us unique. Good speech that originates directly from, and voices what is in, our hearts will always remind us of our Divine origin. To the extent of the sacredness of its color, wealth, and goals, good speech will echo in our hearts like celestial voices providing us with proofs of its origin” (p. 8).

Western literary theory and Positivist epistemology support each other in looking at literature as auto-referential; they view literature as self-reflexive and not referring to any meaning outside it. It is parasitic and, in the words of the French poet Valery, it is like a dance that leads nowhere.

On the other hand, Gulen establishes a relationship between literature and axiology. He says that literature not only describes and creates beauty, it also tells us about our relationship to life and the purpose of life. He rejects the concept of Art for the sake of Art, which is exclusively concerned with creating elegance of form only.

Equally emphatic is his rejection of naturalism in literature that, in the name of realism, puts the emphasis on the sordid, mean, and brutal aspects of life. He advises that literary people should “put their language skills and artistic talents at the service of the right, good, and beautiful, instead of hurting the souls of the masses…by describing what is corrupt, or contaminating people’s pure thoughts with dirty images, and condemning them to the slavery of materialism with descriptions of carnal desires” (p. 15-16).

Gulen exhorts artists to take the prophets and writers of Sufi literature as role models, because all of them have, “acted in cooperation and are united in building prosperous cities from speech, weaving lace from the silken threads of language, and stringing exquisite necklaces with the jewels of words” (p. 5).

Language is an instrument given exclusively to humankind. It has tremendous power and can perform diverse and contradictory functions. In this context, Gulen quotes a hadith that says that a believer must guard his speech because it can be equally used as a remedy and as a weapon. The range of its power can extend in opposite directions: it can revive and kill, establish peace and start war, disclose and hide, liberate and imprison, construct and destroy, exaggerate and downplay. It is therefore necessary to keep watch that one’s language is not misused. When the use of language is yoked to an agenda of self-aggrandisement, or the acquisition of power or monetary profit, it is severed from its divine purpose of pursuing Truth and serving humanity. It degenerates into the rhetoric of hatred and misrepresentation, and generated suspicion, deception, competition and aggression. It becomes an instrument of manipulation and exploitation. Gulen emphasises that we need to use language in a constructive way. He argues for promoting interfaith and intercultural dialogue, because language has tremendous power to make people understand others and to change their perception. It can persuade people to work for peace. It is, in the words of Gulen, “the sword of humankind,” and, “wherever the flag of speech waves, the most powerful armies are defeated and scattered. In the arenas in which speech shouts out, the sounds of cannon balls become like the buzzing of bees. From behind the battlements on which the banner of speech has been raised, the sound of its drums are heard. In the precincts where its march reverberates, kings shake in their boots” (p. 2).

Good speech influences people to make the best of their potential, removes misunderstandings and false consciousness, helps them expand tolerance and promote cooperation, encourages collaboration, and establishes peace. Gulen expresses the educative value of language in these words, “foxes take their leave of deception, and lions are terrified, seeking shelter in their dens.” No “combatant has ever possessed a weapon mightier than speech” (p. 5).

Cognitive linguistics postulates that language is inseparable from thought, and Gulen writes, “Speech is the key that opens the locks on the doors of the treasury of thought” (p. 2). As the famous linguist Wittgenstein said, “My world ends where my language ends.” In Gulen’s view, since language is intertwined with thought, it should be developed and enriched to empower a nation intellectually and morally. He notes and cautions that nations which do not think and speak become dependent on others: “Societies which do not think and speak will find others speak and think on their behalf” (p. 18). Imported views estrange us from our own rich heritage. It is of supreme importance for a nation to be respectful towards the history of its language.

However, language has to go beyond historical value and respond positively to every positive new development. For, as Gulen says, “reaching out to the future at full speed requires catching up with industrialization, global commerce, and technological warehouses.” If language and thought, both living phenomena, do not evolve with the times, they will become stagnant, as solidified as rock, and will lose their soul. Nations that can manage to develop their language and make it accommodating, while at the same time staying faithful to the roots of it, are the most dynamic in thought and influence.

Language can serve both genealogical and teleological functions. As a symbol making activity, language not only embodies, but also preserves, all of our core values and cognitive and intellectual reserves. It also renews our link with our origins and traditional heritage. With its new developments and transformations, language looks to the future – just as our heritage of wisdom, ethics, and ideals can give direction to future, too.

Gulen compares the teleological function of language to a “golden-winged turtledove released by our hopes to the future” (p. 8). The core values of every society are embedded in the symbols of its language. Gulen argues, “Language is not only a means of speech and thought; it is a bridge with the significant function of bringing the wealth of the past to our day and conveying today’s heritage and our new compositions to the future” (p. 17).

Language is an important tool for humankind in our efforts to better understand the cosmos and events both holistically and analytically. The relationship between language and thought comprises cognitive and intellectual reflections on existence and events, transforming these reflections into sources of information, and becoming productive while forming links between the cosmos and our knowledge. The future prospects of a nation are very much dependent on evaluating these relationships. Language is one of the fundamental dynamics in the composition of a culture. We should not cast everything that is old into oblivion, nor turn our face to the past and close our doors to what is new. Let us embrace the past with the utmost sincerity and at the same time salute the coming days with their open, new developments and transformations.

I will conclude with summing up Gulen’s message – Let us use language as a bridge between different cultures and religions to establish peace. Let us use language as a beacon house to illuminate minds and souls, and as a bond to bring people together on the basis of shared human values: compassion, tolerance, harmony, and peace.

References

• Gulen, M. Fethullah. 2010. Speech and Power of Expression: On Language, Esthetics, and Belief, NJ: Tughra Books.
• Medina, Jose. 2005. Language: Key Concepts in Philosophy, Continuum.

The world is too much with us; late and soon,
Getting and spending, we lay waste our powers;
Little we see in nature that is ours;
We have given our hearts away, a sordid boon!
…For this, for everything, we are out of tune;
“The World is too Much with Us” by William Wordsworth

Rapidly changing technology and an endless stream of entertainment and information are the trappings of modern life. When I read Wordsworth’s poem, an old favorite of mine, I was surprised to discover that life wasn’t so different in 1807 than it is now. It made me realize that in some universal sense, I can also say that the world is “too much with me.”

I drink coffee, listen to the news, buy new shoes, go to lunch with my sister, watch football on TV, and move trancelike from one “thing” to another. Understanding that these attractions of the world have always been a timeless trap, I went in search of a way to be free from this trap and sustain happiness.

I first examined Eastern philosophy, which reaffirmed what every good disciple of Zen Buddhism knows: you have to run away from what attracts you in the world. I have always associated the practice of contemplation with the picture of the Buddha sitting peacefully under a tree, detached from the world, wearing an expression of serenity on his face. This expression is also depicted on Christ’s face as he is suspended above the world on a cross.

While these pictures triggered a longing inside me for a modicum of peace, they also reminded me of the discontentment I experience when the world is too much with me. It turns out that discontentment has been referred to in many ways throughout time. The Taoists call it imbalance, Buddhists call it ignorance. The Qur’an calls it “a sickness/disease of the heart” (2:10). And the famous Christian monk, St. Augustine, describes its opposite, “true contentment,” in the following way:

“… [true contentment is] felt only in the presence of God … Our whole business then, in life, is to restore the heart to health so that God can be seen or felt.”

While our modern Western philosophy seduces us with the possibility that we can be happy by consuming and dominating the world, the appeal of Eastern philosophy is the promise that we can be happy by transcending it. Enviably, Buddha had found a way to sustain happiness, without having to buy a new set of clothes. I wanted to know if sustained happiness was possible for me, too. Since Islam is my religion, I set out to discover something about the contemplative practices in Islam, so I could connect with God through my own tradition.

I had never read or come across anyone who described the traditional practices in Islam as “contemplative.” They are called the five pillars of Islam, and they seem so different from other practices, such as meditation in Zen Buddhism. But Islamic contemplative practices, I discovered, are a blend of the best of both worlds, East and West.

I began by examining the first pillar of Islam: Belief in the Oneness of God, or tawhid in Arabic. Tawhid is the central tenet upon which all other beliefs can rest. It demands an exclusive relationship with God, excluding anyone or anything in any similar relationship. This is a relationship that does not recognize any authority besides God—whether it is one’s parents, teacher, or friend. In other words, it is a relationship that presupposes that humankind is liberated from everything in the material and physical world, in order to experience what is known in Islam as taqwa, or piety—the conscious performance of good and avoidance of evil.

Tawhid (liberation) is manifest in the Buddha seated under the tree, and taqwa (piety) is seen in his facial expression. In Islamic terms, the predisposition of liberation (tawhid) is the foundation of Islamic contemplative practice. It is the same as saying that to sustain happiness, you have to let go of what attracts you in the world.

How is this done in Islam? The quintessential example of “stepping outside” of the world is the disciple sitting for 18 hours in the lotus blossom position. This helped me to describe the two essential characteristics of contemplative practice as being: 1) a physical “stepping outside” of the world; and 2) something painful or difficult, or both.

Islamic prayer bears both these characteristics. The time-out is brief, but it also happens five times a day. In other words, it requires me to step outside of my life and let go (detach), for short periods of time throughout the day, every day. It may not be as difficult as sitting in the lotus position for 18 hours, but believe me the hardest part of this practice is making yourself stop what you’re doing in order to pray.

Meditation and Islamic prayer also share the imperative of self-discipline. Fully conscious of the pain and sacrifice associated with contemplative practices, the Hindus say, tears and prayers go hand-in-hand. I think the biggest challenge for Muslims is finding the time to pray each day. Given the demands of life on one hand and the schedule of five daily prayers on the other, self-discipline is tested in the constancy of personal choices: Do I watch the rest of my favorite TV program or turn it off in time to pray? At which point do I end my phone conversation? When do I stop working on my computer? And, how do I excuse myself from a fun gathering of family or friends just to say my prayers on time?

These choices get to the crux of the spiritual matter. Do I continue participating in the world, or do I stop and step outside of it at punctuated times? I failed miserably at my first attempts to pray five prayers a day. It took me years to realize that trying to squeeze my prayers into my busy life was a futile and backwards approach.

What helped me most was re-reading the oft-repeated command in the Qur’an that says “establish prayer” in your life. I finally figured out that if I could establish my daily life around the commuter train schedule, as I did to get to work, then why couldn’t I establish my life around a prayer schedule?

When I took this approach, I was able to establish prayers in my life. First, it was just one prayer a day, then, two, until ultimately I was praying five times a day. In essence, I had “established” a sacred space and contemplative time in my busy life, creating a virtual sanctuary, with no trespassing. The result has been a virtuous circle of sustained happiness, nurtured by my sustained commitment.

In addition, to be successful in both prayer and meditation, a disciple has to have some effective way to keep the worries and demands of the world at bay. Otherwise, time-out quickly becomes time-wasted. I remember studying transcendental meditation in the early 1970s. The Yogi (practitioner of yoga) taught me to use my mantra (a sound, syllable or word considered capable of creating a spiritual transformation) as a way to focus (which cost me $450 at the time). He said “thought bubbles” of worldly concerns would rise to the surface but that I must release them in order to empty my mind repeatedly.

With Islamic prayer, it is no less challenging to keep focused. But the genius of prayer in Islam is that the prayers are in Arabic, the language of the Qur’an. Learning and memorizing the Arabic language is challenging to all Muslims, whether Arabic-speaking or not (and most are not). But concentration on the Arabic words (which I vaguely understand) and recitation of memorized prayers, coupled with the physical requirements of performing prayer, play a significant role in keeping focused on the task of communion with God.

Next, I tried to determine the times when I had ever felt God’s presence (a sense of taqwa) in my life. The answer was easy. It was during the holy month of Ramadan, a month of fasting from dawn to dusk, another pillar of Islamic practice. Christians, Muslims or Jews who have fasted know that fasting changes your routine life, at the most critical and basic level. I found that even though I was standing in the middle of my life, fasting separated me from everything going on around me.

Analyzing the results of this alternative state (tawhid), I realized that fasting had liberated me from the most basic enslavements of our modern, secular world, allowing my spirit to soar freely above the din. Taking one step further, whenever my personal covenant with God was tested by an aching hunger or profound thirst, I would ask myself: Why am I doing this? And in that moment, when I am most conscious of the extreme sacrifice I am making, I am also acutely aware that I have a choice: I can keep my promise to God to fast, or break it. Thus, when I consciously choose my relationship with God above all else, I experience the pure sweetness of taqwa in the depths of my soul. Taqwa is my constant companion during Ramadan, for every time I make a conscious choice to fast, my heart fills with it.

Prior to making the pilgrimage to Mecca (Hajj), I had experienced only fleeting moments of taqwa. But the journey to Mecca is like Alice going down the rabbit hole, leaving her life and traveling to another world for an extended period of time, which is sometimes very scary. Unlike Ramadan, when you resume the semblance of your normal life at the end of the day, nothing is normal during the pilgrimage to Mecca.

Every religion asks us to abandon comfort and familiar ways, or give something up. We get up early to pray, we fast, we hone our virtues, purify our inner self, and treat our neighbors well, with the hope of achieving that Divine communion. We have learned that diligence without assurance is otherwise known as faith.

I know of no other journey that has tested or strengthened my faith as much as the Hajj. Mysteriously, I still cannot fully articulate why this is so. The imams warned us before we left, “You will be out of your comfort zone.” But that was an understatement. This was a journey to a world more foreign and exhilarating than I have ever seen or been. The rituals we had to perform were far beyond my physical capacity. Furthermore, everything about the world that I was familiar with was fading into the past, further and further into obscurity and insignificance.

Ironically, the further I stepped out of my world, the closer I felt to God (a deeper sense of taqwa). At the same time, I became more intimately in touch with myself in a way I had never experienced before. It was a time of self-renewal, and through it all, I held the unwavering belief that God, my Creator, was guiding me. I just humbly submit, and I do not know how or why. All I know is that I had made a choice long ago to fulfill this pillar of Islam, even though at times, I feared I might never be able to afford it. Yet, when I finally had the opportunity to go on the pilgrimage and things got tough along the way, I would always ask myself: Why am I doing this? And the answer always came from my heart: it was my choice and my promise.

“Do not imagine that the journey is short; and one must have the heart of a lion to follow the unusual road, for it is very long…. One plods along in a state of amazement, sometimes smiling, sometimes weeping…” Rumi

Mary Lahaj is a Muslim Chaplain to the community at the Islamic Center of Boston in Wayland, MA.

Expansion can be dealt with in two categories: Our relationship with the created, and our relationship with the Creator.

With respect to our relationship with the created, expansion means that we are careful of our connection with God and the Truth; that we live in our communities as one of its inhabitants, being open with and showing respect to everyone; and that we treat people according to their level of understanding.

The noble Prophet, upon him be peace and blessings, was sincere and frank with those around him, and avoided ceremony or formality. He spoke according to his listeners’ level of understanding, and sometimes made wise and meaningful jokes. Although he suffered inwardly from the unbelief, injustice, and sins he witnessed, and was anxious about everyone’s end and afterlife, he always smiled and behaved pleasantly. As said in al-Minhaj: “A heart is like a mirror: too much and too frequent solemnity may cause it to steam up, and the only way to remove that steam is to tell pleasant jokes.”

With respect to our relationship with God Almighty, expansion signifies the simultaneous experiencing of fear and hope in our souls. Being states of the soul, fear and hope are usually found in those who have just started to advance on the path to God. Expansion, on the other hand, is a state of those with knowledge of God and, moreover, is a dimension of the heart’s life. The state resembling the expansion of those still striving to reach this level of expansion is an exhilaration coming from knowledge of God. This may lead them to become relaxed in their relationship with God, and thus lose their self-control and self-possession.

Expansion appears when a traveler on the path of God is completely freed from carnal desire and passion, and becomes a bright “mirror” to reflect God’s Names and Attributes. This station, whether called the Station of Combination (where the traveler experiences God’s Existence and Unity) or Annihilation (where the traveler’s annihilation of self causes forgetfulness of self when in the throes of ecstatic love of God and perception of God’s Existence and Unity), is a mysterious point where the traveler directs himself or herself according to the Divine inspirations received and assumes “colors” unknown to everybody else. It is impossible for such people to conceal their expansion, while it is insolent of those who have not attained it to talk about it. How aptly Rumi expresses it:

If the king’s courtier behaves in an affected manner to attract the king’s attention, you must not attempt to do so, for you do not have the document (to justify your doing so). O one who cannot be freed from the restrictions of this transient life, how can you know what (the stations of) annihilation, drunkenness, and expansion mean?

Indeed, servants of the body cannot be aware of the states of the spirit. It is impossible for those imprisoned in the body to be aware of spirituality. We should ask those souls who have burned and been “roasted” many times in the fire of the love of God about the pains of a heart that has been cleft open, and their expansion and contraction.

O God! Endear belief to us and make it appealing to our hearts, and make unbelief, transgression, and rebellion hateful to us; and include us among those with right conduct and sound thinking. And bestow blessings and peace on our Master Muhammad and his Companions, all of them.

Just like it is unimaginable to be in love with anything without considering its reasons and motives, it is unlikely that everyone is receptive of inner dimension at all times. Some are born as receptive while some keep on developing this aptitude of theirs for a whole lifetime, then subsequent to a certain term, they attain a capacity large enough for encompassing space and time in their entirety. Such individuals lead their lives in an appetite for inner meaning and metaphysical profundity on an infinite scale and throughout the path they live as if their hunger is insatiable. Many others obtain material and corporeal phenomena to achieve fulfillment but time and again grow weary as this often turns into routine. However the ones with their spiritual lives that are transcendent above the boundaries of reality at full speed and with an endless yearning, walk on new paths, stop over at different places, associate each visited place with a wisdom in the real time context and in connection with the past and future stations; in search of divine knowledge, love and spiritual delight, they roam with incessant desire, just like lovers seeking each other, running from one horizon to another.

The created’s relationship of intense, ecstatic love and yearning with the Creator is for mortal and ephemeral beings the horizon of metamorphosis and becoming immortal by attaining a second existence via their essence. Considering a different perspective, such a relationship is a lover’s stripping of his or her existence and growing radiant and spiritual, thereby melting in the beloved’s existence and submitting altogether to His will. Having reached to such a spiritual culmination, each soul is purified to the extent of decency in the heart, even as it is a mere particle, it reaches a breadth huge enough to encompass the entire creation and becomes “the perfect pattern of creation.” Such a relationship that commences with belief and develops through divine knowledge, deepening with love and attaining eternity through passion, is a sort of reply we give to what God, the All-Truth, seeks in us. Thanks to such a relationship God’s presence is always felt free from any limitations of quality or quantity in the course of which an infinite bliss flutters about constantly. Except for such a horizon of delight which turns thousands of souls proceeding on the line extending from all prophets and saints, as well as – irrespective of any differences in considerations – such heroes of love like Musset, Pascal, St. Augustine, and Jeans into moths to the flame; a manifest chain of calamities are Pharaoh-like tyranny and vanity, Nimrod-like decadence and deviance, delirium and insanity, lack of vision and utter dejection that befog humanity’s atmosphere of thought, invade their hearts with doldrums, and even turn their lives into a void within a void. Contrary to the former group’s use of this world as a spiral of human perfection and turning celestial, the latter, by indulging in the darkness they bred within their own souls, sentenced themselves to eternal death.

Those who are open to spiritual life from the very beginning or those who have waken up for such a horizon after a surprise favor from God – no matter if their paths at times intersect with murky darkness – lead their lives as one with light and chase light for a whole lifetime. Just in that way, their every distress is the outset of a new expansion and each suffering is the travails of a new birth.

Almost all respites across the globe have always been nurtured by hardships and developed on the bosom of oppressions. Each period of love and enthusiasm has materialized throughout an episodic span of suffering and tribulation. Just like Greek philosophy gained its perfection through love and ordeal in the valleys of reflection and inquisitiveness, the Renaissance movement too developed after nurtured by love of truth and ardor for research. The inner dimension of the cycle of other historical recurrences in the same extent is yet another topic entitled to special consideration…

In the realm of the faithful, ardor for eternity, love for truth, systematic reflection and inquisitiveness experienced a phase of eruption to an extent out of bounds and either directly or indirectly radiated the world for centuries. How we wished the continuance of such a golden age! How sad it is that time, in consequence of countless reasons and throughout subsequent periods, has revealed unpredictably agonizing interpretations against our favor. In the present era we are in need of superhuman efforts to imbue the flow of time with our own colors. Not only shall we live in utter misery until the time we display such an endeavor, put forward our genuine character and aptitude by means of sufferance and anguish, and crochet our lacework of thought and life in accordance to these; neither does it seem possible to form a moral movement which is nurtured by a unique array of faithful life, art or science. Just like individuals devoid of love and divine knowledge, the nations experiencing the same deficiency are also doomed to collapse and disintegrate.

Individuals or societies, who are sealed against metaphysical thought and without profundity in essence, one day, after losing their entire vital dynamics altogether, get strewn and scattered around just like autumn leaves. In such a condition, cultural movements stagnate, slowly the society, with the young and the old, with its numerous walks of life, grows tired and educational institutions succumb to formalism. Words of thought and learning lose their real essence and context, then as a consequence everything becomes a means of conceit and airs for the administrators of the ill-fated educational institutions. Conversely, in Ancient Greece, across the Islamic world (especially in the fourth century following its advent), and during the Renaissance years in the West, those stunning developments had always sprouted in the condition of countless pangs; were nurtured by the love for truth and passion for divine knowledge; depicted through arts and technology, then were entrusted to history by way of reconciling them with the societies’ spiritual and essential values.

For the last one or two centuries a major part of the world has been experiencing complete loss of sight, severe spiritual infirmity, and arrhythmia in hearts. The condition is such that eyes can see nothing, ears cannot hear a sound, and consciences cannot make their voices heard amidst the din of those who seek everything in material. In such a world science is blind, religion is lame, art is paralyzed, government is incoherent and is caught in the web of oppositions and overthrows. Politics is linked to interests and acclaims, people of science are in pursuit of medals and awards, young generations are light-headed, carefree and in delirium, the mighty are locked in on despotism and tyranny-in the face of all these things the masses moan under misery and humiliation. In such a society there may be many people who read, think, do research, and dream of arts. However, among them only a very few rise against various privations, each making a retreat to the depths of their hearts and strive to explore their spiritual strength. On the other hand, there are innumerable individuals, each of whom follow a different idol and are in vigil of a different expectation; those who are disrespectful to knowledge, insensible for morals, superficial on the passion for truth and extremely unfaithful to upholding their own values. Curious enough, in such a society the ever-despised and disdained popular crowds display through their voices discourses and traits, a more coherent stance than a group of insincere elites whose minds are as disorderly as their hearts and whose emotions are as inconsistent as their thoughts.

Seemingly, we need nothing else but the “hearts of fire” who will deliver us from such an extent of misery and indolence, and make us hear the voices of our own souls. It seems that until the time each of these sincere hearts – by means of erupting streams of lava from their magma-like bosoms – will form everywhere new avenues for our society and channel us towards the horizon of our fortune; we will always suffer from the disadvantages of our indolence. We will undergo stifling anguish around the clock and will never be able to get on our feet again. On these days, as people turn to metaphysics and spiritualism, we wish from God to bestow vigor on our willpower and radiance on our horizons.

Above all, it should be said that this saying is weak in regard to the hadith criteria. However, there is a verse in the Quran that expresses the same idea: “In the creation of the heavens and the earth, and the alternation of night and day, there are indeed signs for the people of discernment” (Al Imran 3:190). In one hadith the Messenger of God emphasizes the importance of contemplation: “Whoever reads this verse and does not contemplate on it, shame on him.” In addition, it was reported by Umm Salama and-according to another narration-Aisha, that the Prophet cried when this verse was revealed or when he was reading it.

Contemplation has a very important place in the life of a believer. However, for this to be the case we must understand what contemplation means. First of all, contemplation is based on prior knowledge. Blind and ignorant contemplation is dry imagination and in time it will lead to frustration. Later, a person will begin to see such a practice as meaningless. For this reason, a person must first be familiar with the subject they are going to contemplate or, in other words, they must have some prior information.

Understanding the orbit of the moon and stars, their relation to humanity, the revolution of atoms which make up human beings, and their movement is a step towards contemplation, but looking at the movement of the moon and sun and becoming overwhelmed with poetic inspiration about the mind-boggling beauty of the universe is not contemplation. There are a number of lonely, strange, handicapped naturalist poets who think like this and plunge into their imagination. They are not contemplators; rather they are fanciful people who have lost their hearts to Mephistopheles.

They also can sometimes think and talk about the beauty of the universe. Worldly beauty can be made to be legendary with words, inspiring people to feel and hear the beauties of Heaven. Sometimes poets can write such epics about the splashing of water, the tapping of raindrops, the rustling of trees and the chirping of birds that a person feels as if they are in the middle of the heavens. However, this is not contemplation; moreover, it promises nothing for the life of the heart and spirit. In this way no advances are made and one has not passed behind the veils. There is no benefit from such contemplation. Regardless of how deep the dreams are, such contemplation gains nothing for a person.

As mentioned above, before contemplation it is necessary that there first be some information. In respect to the knowledge humanity has now attained, people will make new syntheses and analyses with the previous knowledge, probing deeper and arriving at different conclusions. Using these conclusions as an introductory basis for future conclusions, new results will be produced. These new results will be contemplated more deeply; one-dimensional thinking will become multi-dimensional and multiple-contemplation will be achieved. All of this is dependent on there being information. It is impossible for people to contemplate without information.

For this reason, it is necessary to do a lot of reading. Later, it is necessary to study the path and method of contemplation and finally the rules that are operative in nature and the signs of creation therein should be studied so that we can create the possibility of steady and sound thinking.

If a person contemplates soundly for one hour, the fundamental principles of faith will develop in that person. Later, that person will love God and a profound love for the divine will appear in their heart. Meanwhile, they will attain spiritual pleasure and take flight towards the beyond. Sometimes with this kind of contemplation a person can reach a horizon that another person has not reached with a thousand years of worship. If one with such an understanding and consciousness does not turn towards their Lord, then even after thinking superficially for a thousand years, the distance they will cover will not equal the distance covered by one hour of contemplation. However, this should not be understood to mean that this one thousand years of worship was in vain. For in God’s presence neither a bow or prostration or standing or a short rest between movements can be lost. In accordance with the verses, “whoever does an atom’s weight of good will see it, and whoever does an atom’s weight of evil will see it” (Zilzal 99:7–9), everyone will gain something in accordance with their actions. A person who performs worship will have fulfilled their devotion to God. However, they will not have gained the depth that is derived from contemplation. In this sense, contemplation is worth a thousand years of worship.

Everyone can broaden their ability to contemplate with portions of the scripture and remembrance, and they can strengthen their relationship with God. Who knows, maybe because of the enthusiasm that this contemplation will give us we can succeed in renewing ourselves. May God reform us inside and out!

Finally, it is also asked: “Do verses that direct one to contemplation and silent prayer count as contemplation?” If the meaning of these is not understood, then, although one will receive merit for them, they are not contemplation. For contemplation stems from reflection and means bringing together events from yesterday and today, making a synthesis, and establishing a connection between the causes and effects. Strengthening our relationship with God is the most important fruit of this. Any remembrance or verse or, in fact, even listening to the scripture from the mouth of Gabriel himself would be merit, but it is not contemplation. To be considered as contemplation there must be a concentration, focus, a serious investigation and a deepening and strengthening of our relationship with our Lord.

What is most lacking today is contemplation. In this respect, it is not an exaggeration to say that in general believers are deficient in contemplation.

In this essay, I will embark on the task of clarifying some common problems associated with the study of Islam and democracy, and introduce alternative ways of looking at the relative absence of democratic regimes in Muslim-majority countries. In doing so, I will make use of two important recent works. The first is Islam and the Challenge of Democracy by Khaled Abou El Fadl (2004). Abou El Fadl discusses opportunities within the Islamic theological doctrine for a democratic form of government; in fact, he suggests that democracy best suits the social and political values set forth by the Islamic doctrine. The second piece includes the ideas of the well-known Islamic scholar Fethullah Gulen compiled in a special issue of The Muslim World journal dedicated to Gulen in 2005. To a series of questions regarding the individual, the state, and the type of regime, Gulen approaches the question from a different perspective, emphasizing “universal values” in both Islamic fundamentals and democratic ideals, and he rejects the incompatibility between Islam and democracy. I will also briefly discuss the implications of the debate on Islam and democracy from a broader perspective, bringing the religion, in general terms, to the discussion, and I will explain what the implications might be from an interfaith perspective.

Political Islam? Misconstrued Islam of the modern times

One common problem in the analyses of Islam is the misjudgment of what is observed in the last century or so, predominantly through the eyes of Orientalist writers. In essence, this perspective focuses on Islam more as a political ideology and less as a religion, whereby individuals organize their lives around the pillars of the faith. According to this new scheme, Islam is confined to a system of political ideas, and the problems of Muslims worldwide are to be solved by this emerging concept of Islam. Interestingly, this perspective has been embraced by some Muslims, as well as by observers from the West. The Islamic authenticity of this perception is never questioned.

A closely related problem arises in viewing the states that emerge in Muslim-majority countries as Islamic, regardless of any objective criteria to judge them as Islamic. In many cases, the Islamic rhetoric used by government officials is considered enough to categorize them as Islamic, even though no legal Islamic authority has been implemented in such states. In essence, many authoritarian rulers disguise themselves as representing Islam when they do not even come close to being Islamic in their actions. Having an Islamic population or a Muslim leader does not equate to an Islamic state; in this vein, not every state that uses Islam in its discourse should be regarded as Islamic. Esposito and Voll draw attention to this problem. According to them, what we observe in Muslim-majority countries is the coupling of authoritarian regimes with more secular understandings, and democratic demands with the more Islamic portions of the populations: “As a result, authoritarian political establishments have become identified with secularist approaches to politics and modernization…The most effective opposition to authoritarian regimes is expressed through a reaffirmation of the Islamic identity and heritage.”2 Politicians in every country make use of religious rhetoric as best as they can because it provides a significant amount of legitimacy to their political strategies. Hence, just as President Bush’s or German Chancellor Merkel’s3 occasional references to religion do not make their rule non-secular, nor their countries theocracies, similar references by the various rulers in the Muslim-majority countries should be regarded in a parallel way.

An alternative problematic conceptualization concerns the principle of secularism, and the separation of religious and political spheres. One commonly asserted claim is that most Muslim-majority countries are ruled with a fusion of these two spheres. Samuel Huntington is a leading figure in pursuing this line of argument. In arguing against the possibility of democratic regimes in Muslim-majority countries, Huntington claims that Islam also rejects any distinction between the religious community and the political community. Hence there is no equipoise between Caesar and God, and political participation is linked to religious affiliation.”4 However, in Steven Fish’s observation, it is, in fact, difficult to come up with more than a couple examples of states in the Islamic world that intertwine religious and political powers, such as Iran and the Taliban’s Afghanistan.5

Culture and Islam

Ronald Inglehart, who is among the pioneers of cultural arguments, claims that diverse Islamic cultures do not go well with democratic practices. In an article in Foreign Affairs in 2003, Inglehart and Norris claim that various cultural elements stand between democracy and Muslim countries, including divorce, abortion, gender equality, and gay rights.6 From a different cultural perspective, Manus Midlarsky claims that a low level of tolerance has been the root cause of the inconsistency of Islam with democracy.7 In other contexts, hierarchy and obedience were introduced as Islamic cultural elements that are incompatible with democracy and economic development.

There are two kinds of problems with these cultural arguments. First, in a direct sense, some of these cultural attributes do exist in Muslim-majority countries, yet their connection with Islam has not been well established by the proponents of such arguments. For example, on the issue of intolerance and gender inequality, it would take considerable effort to find theological evidence from the scripture or the practices of the Prophet to support any behavior that is disrespectful and intolerant toward non-Muslims, or suggesting the superiority of men over women. In this sense, even though it may be argued that such cultural traits are not consistent with a democratic culture, relating these attitudes to an Islamic culture seems unfounded.9

Secondly, it seems rather unusual to conceptualize the issues of divorce, abortion and gay rights together with democracy. In many instances, the comparison groups used to evaluate the relative merits of such cultural traits are irrelevant. Take for example, Inglehart and Norris’ comparison of contemporary Western societies, which made the transition to democracy a long time ago, contrasted with contemporary Muslim societies, most of which have not experienced democracy yet. When we consider contemporary Western societies, we cannot show that current or similar cultural attitudes were dominant a century ago, when most democratization happened in these countries. In this regard, it is important initially to establish the causal relationship between “cultural” factors such as divorce, abortion, and gay rights, and democratization in contemporary Western democracies; otherwise, simple correlational analysis will not provide useful evidence for this end.10 It may easily be the case that these new “post-materialist”11 cultural values in Western societies, A la Inglehart, are only a product of various phenomena, including economic development and democracy, and not a cause of them.

In essence, the distinction between religion, that is, Islam, and culture-which varies with respect to the conditions in which a society lives, such as geography, education, wealth, and history-has to be emphasized. This misunderstanding underlies most of the judgments against the incompatibility of Islam and democracy.

Doctrinal underpinnings

It is important to evaluate the relationship between Islam and democracy from the vantage point of existing political systems. There is no doubt that democracy provides the most appropriate alternative among the myriad of political systems that exist today. Two recent analyses by Gulen and Abou El Fadl make this point very clear. Both Islam and democracy emphasize and embrace values and ideals, such as human rights, the protection of minorities, freedom of expression and religious practice, and the rule of law.

A common concern about the relationship between Islam and democracy is where sharia rule fits in this context. Abou El Fadl draws attention to the contradiction between the contemporary states which call themselves “Islamist,” and the historical practice in prioritizing the legislative powers of the state versus the “divine law”: “For instance, the claim of precautionary measures (blocking the means) is used in Saudi Arabia to justify a wide range of restrictive laws against women, including the prohibition against driving cars. This is a relatively novel invention in Islamic state practices and in many instances, it amounts to the use of sharia in passing laws that create an oppressive condition-a condition that itself is contrary to the principles of justice under sharia.”

On sharia, Gulen argues that if a (democratic) state gives an individual the “opportunity” to learn and practice his or her religion, then the political system is “not considered to be against the teaching of the Qur’an.” Moreover, when a political system is consistent with “universal norms of law,” particularly in human rights and freedoms, there is no need for another form of state: “Even if such a renewal is not considered tashri’ (based on sharia), it is not conceived of as being against it.”14 Moving beyond black or white, and yes or no, Gulen argues that a political system that does not stem from sharia does not necessarily imply being against sharia; hence, a political system, such as democracy, may in fact be congruent with the basic tenets of the religion. Sharia, Gulen suggests, for the most part, relates to the personal religious life “supported by God’s commands, the Prophet’s sayings and practices, and the consensus of the Muslim community.” Principles regarding politics and state administration account for only five percent of the whole, whereas the rest focuses on issues related to “the articles of faith, the pillars of Islam, and the moral principles of religion.”15 As a result, most of the concern about Sharia is unfounded.

The final point in this section concerns the role of the individual and the nature of the relationship between the state and the individual. Islam regards government as a contract between the ruler and the ruled. Both have duties, responsibilities, and rights. In contrast to the common practice in many Muslim-majority countries, both the ruler and the ruled are subject to the rule of law. Hence, dictatorship and arbitrary rule are illegitimate forms of government: “In an Islamic administration, those who are at the top have to obey the law like ordinary people: They cannot violate these principles and cannot act in their practice against these principles.”16 In a similar vein, the right to rule does not belong to any kind of spiritual leaders, that is, the ulama, or to any other religious institution. Instead, the value and importance of the individual human being, and his/her righteousness, has been emphasized on various occasions. In this context, Abou El Fadl, like Gulen, addresses the ulama and its role in Islamic rule. He argues that while the ulama might have played a mediatory role between the rulers and the ruled, and even “thwarted tyrannous measures” in the past, unfortunately, in modern times, they have turned into “salaried state functionaries who play a primarily conservative, legitimist role for the ruling regimes in the Islamic world.”17 Based on this discussion, it becomes important to recognize the fact that Islam, on doctrinal grounds, underscores human rights, freedom of expression and religion, and individual accountability.18 This indicates the compatibility of Islam within a democratic political system.

Alternatives

Instead of trying to find the root-causes of the democratic gap in Islam, one should carefully analyze alternative factors to account for the dearth of democratic politics in Muslim-majority countries. Various alternative explanations have been discussed in the literature to account for democratization. One such model is Modernization Theory, which takes economic development to the center and asserts that education, social mobilization, urbanization, and communication are all considered integral parts of the modernization process that marks the transition from traditional forms of life to modern ones. This entire modernization process generates new social groups such as urban workers and union members that have different needs and demands from the political system compared to the old “social strata.”19 The political system, now, is placed at the center of the demands of these new social groups. In order to respond to the newly-emerging needs of the modern citizen, who has incidentally become aware of his/her capacity, the political system takes a more responsive and democratic form.

An alternative explanation comes in the form of “resource curse,” a term coined during the 1990s to explain various problems associated with countries endowed with rich natural resources. In contrast to what is observed in the rest of the world, in the Middle East, the idea of a rentier state prevails thanks to the abundance of natural energy resources. The state, in the region, does not depend on its subjects for revenues, that is, taxes. The state, and to a large extent the ruling elite, collect the revenues from the sale of natural resources in world markets. Lisa Anderson, in her analysis of state-building in the Middle East, brings forth the idea of democratic accountability of the ruling elite and the role it plays, or its lack thereof.

The distribution of these massive revenues entails an important benefit for the state. The state becomes “autonomous” from the society by means of “winning popular acquiescence through distribution rather than support through taxation and representation.” The absence of dependence on society on the part of the state results in the absence of democratic accountability to the people. The underlying rationale behind the “distributive state” is that everyone in the society receives roughly the same amount of benefits from the state, or “egalitarian current consumption” in Anderson’s terms. The result is an authoritarian political system with no internal mechanism to press for democratic development.

Religion and democracy

Concerns about the compatibility of democracy with various other religions have been frequently raised, namely with regard to such religions as Catholicism, Christian Orthodoxy, Confucianism, and Buddhism.21 Similar issues, as in the case of Islam, have been raised about these religions, and their cultural spheres: the hierarchical structure of the church, the emphasis on communal life rather than individualism, and the prominence of obedience and respect.22 Such criticisms over the course of this century, in fact, have a common implication from an interfaith dialogue perspective. Although in certain instances the concerns invoked against these cultural and religious traits may hold, we should bear in mind the fact that these religions embody a complex set of ideas, and doctrines; more than anything else, these religions indeed have the capacity to renew themselves over time to synchronize themselves with the requirements of the present. Hence, judging against religions too soon may prove inaccurate.

In this essay, I have tried to correct a number of misconceptions about Islam and its compatibility with democracy. In doing so, I have relied on the recent writings of two Islamic scholars of our time, Gulen and Abou El Fadl. Often, cultural traits of Muslims worldwide are accepted as Islam itself; similarly, Muslim-majority countries are, by default, regarded as being “Islamic” even though nothing in their constitutions or practices suggests this conclusion. The absence of stable democratic regimes among Muslim-majority countries is, in my opinion, due to non-religious reasons such as oil-dependency in the case of Middle East, and low levels of education and economic development more generally.

A. Kadir Yildirim is doctoral candidate at the Ohio State University in Political Science. He studies politics of globalization and social protection in developing countries, and politics of the Middle East. He can be reached at yildirim.10@osu.edu

Notes

1.Throughout the modern era, a number of Muslim-populated countries experienced democratic regimes such as Turkey, Indonesia, Algeria, and Pakistan. However, most of such regimes are far from being recognized as stable democracies, where the chances for an authoritarian backlash are significantly lower than the unstable and precarious regimes in many Muslim-majority countries. In this regard, even though the current political regime – as opposed to the Suharto era – is democracy in Indonesia, the regime is qualitatively different than the ones we observe in Australia or Britain. Hence, the emphasis here is not merely on procedural elements of democracy, but on democracy as a comprehensive and stable political system with both its substantive and procedural elements. For more on democracy and elements of democratic regimes, please see Robert Dahl, 1971, Polyarchy: Participation and Opposition, Yale University Press; Dankwart A. Rustow, 1970, “Transitions to Democracy: Toward a Dynamic Model,” Comparative Politics, vol. 2(3); Samuel P. Huntington, 1968, Political Order in Changing Societies, Yale University Press; Larry Diamond, 1999, Developing Democracy: Toward Consolidation, Johns Hopkins University Press.

2.John L. Esposito and John O. Voll, 1996, Islam and Democracy, p.16.

3.For an article by Ron Suskind on President Bush’s occasional references to religion, please see the 10/17/2004 issue of NY Times’ Magazine section. Merkel’s reference to the Christian roots of the EU: “I can’t deny that I would have preferred to see a clearer reference to God based on Christian ideals in the constitution.” For complete text, please see the following webpage: http://news.scotsman.com/latest.cfm?id=319152007

4Samuel Huntington, 1991, The Third Wave: Democratization in the Late Twentieth Century, p. 307. A similar point is raised by Bernard Lewis in “Islam and Liberal Democracy: A Historical Overview,” Journal of Democracy, vol. 7(2), (1996).

5.M. Steven Fish, 2002, “Islam and Authoritarianism,” World Politics, vol. 55 (October).

6.Ronald Inglehart and Pippa Norris, 2003, “The True Clash of Civilizations,” Foreign Affairs, March-April issue, p. 63.

7.Manus Midlarsky, 1998, “Democracy and Islam: Implications for Civilizational Conflict and the Democratic Peace,” International Studies Quarterly, vol. 42(3), pp. 485-511.

8.Jim Granato, Ronald Inglehart, and David Leblang, 1996, “The Effect of Cultural Values on Economic Development: Theory, Hypotheses, and Some Empirical Tests,” American Journal of Political Science, vol. 40(3), pp. 607-631.

9.To see how women’s rights and treatment of non-Muslims are dealt with in Islam, please see the Farewell Sermon of Prophet Muhammad (pbuh): Sahih Al-Bukhari, Hadith number 1623, 1626, 6361; Sahih of Imam Muslim also refers to this sermon in Hadith number 98.

10.Correlational analysis can only demonstrate that we observe divorce, abortion, gay rights and democracy in Western democracies; in and of itself, such an analysis can neither provide a causal mechanism to prove that these cultural traits lead to democratization, nor that the relationship is historically accurate.

11.These are the values that emphasize self-expression and quality of life in contrast to materialist values which center around economic and physical security. See Ronald Inglehart, 1997, Modernization and Postmodernization: Cultural, Economic, and Political Change in 43 Societies, Princeton University Press.

12.See The Muslim World, vol. 95(3), pp. 450-456 for Gulen’s comments. Also, see Islam and the Challenge of Democracy, Princeton University Press (2004), pp. 3-5 for Khaled Abou El Fadl’s comments on this point.

13.Islam and the Challenge of Democracy, p. 15.

14.The Muslim World, vol. 95(3), p.451.

15.Ibid, p. 451.

16.Ibid, p. 450. A similar point is raised by Abou El Fadl, p. 3.

17.Islam and the Challenge of Democracy, p. 16.

18.For further treatment of the subject, please see John L. Esposito and John O. Voll, 1996, Islam and Democracy; Omer Caha, 2003, “Islam and Democracy: A Theoretical Discussion on the Compatability of Islam and Democracy,” Alternatives, vol. 2(3-4); Fethullah Gulen, 2001, “A Comparative Approach to Islam and Democracy,” SAIS Review, Vol. 21(2); Ermin Sinanovic, 2004, “The Majority Principle in Islamic Legal and Political Thought,” Islam and Christian-Muslim Relation, vol. 15(2).

19.Karl Deutsch, 1961, “Social Mobilization and Political Development,” American Political Science Review, vol. 55(3), pp. 493-514.

20.Lisa Anderson, 1987, “The State in the Middle East and North Africa,” Comparative Politics, vol. 20(1), pp. 1-18.

21.See Nader A. Hashemi’s commentary on Abou El Fadl’s article in Islam and the Challenge of Democracy, p. 51.

22.Various studies have analyzed the relationship between religions and democratic origins and compatibility. For examples, please see Max Weber, 2001, Protestant Ethic and the Spirit of Capitalism, Routledge; Jim Granato, Ronald Inglehart, David Leblang, 1996, “Cultural Values, Stable Democracy, and Economic Development: A Reply,” American Journal of Political Science, Vol. 40(3); Steve Bruce, 2004, “Did Protestantism Create Democracy,” Democratization, vol. 11(4); Michael Minkenberg, 2007, “Democracy and Religion – Theoretical and Empirical Observations on the Relationship Between Christianity, Islam and Liberal Democracy,” Journal of Ethnic and Migration Studies; Bruce, S., 2004 “Did Protestantism Create Democracy?” in Anderson, J. (ed.) Religion, Democracy, and Democratization, Frank Cass; Chaibong, H., 2004 “The Ironies of Confucianism,” Journal of Democracy, vol. 15(3).

]]> https://fountainmagazine.com/all-issues/2005/issue-52-october-december-2005/the-inner-profundity-of-humankind/ Sat, 01 Oct 2005 00:00:00 +0000 http://107.21.79.195/all-issues/2005/issue-52-october-december-2005/the-inner-profundity-of-humankind/ The human being is the essence and the vital element of being, the index and core element of the universe. Human beings are at the center of creation; all other things, living or non-living, compose concentric circles around them. It could be said that the Exalted Creator has oriented every creature toward human beings, and He has oriented human beings toward His Divine Attraction by making them aware of the fact that this is the point where support and expectation of help can be found. Taking into account all the honor that has been granted to humanity, compared with all the rest of creation, humanity must be seen as the voice that expresses the nature of things, the nature of events and, of course, the nature of the All-Powerful One Who is behind everything, as well as being understood as a heart that encompasses all the universes. With human beings, creation has found its interpreter and matter has been distilled through the cognition of people, finding its spiritual meaning. The monitoring of things is an ability peculiar to human beings, their being able to read and interpret the book of the universe is a privilege, and their attribution of everything to the Creator is an exceptional blessing. Their quiet introspection is contemplation, their speech is wisdom, and their conclusive interpretation of all things is love.

Humans are the ones who have been granted the privilege to rule and make use of creation; and humans are the ones who reveal all the aspects of the truth behind natural phenomena, offering these to the Creator. Humans sense and discern the relationship between humanity, the universe, and the Creator-a relationship which leads them to knowledge. They discover their potential and depths, surpassing the angels as they are granted the ability to reflect the grandeur of the ocean in a single drop and to reflect all the suns within a single atom. Having honored the Earth, humanity’s heels have become the crowns of those who were previously created, and their being created on the Earth has been the pride of this physical world related to the spiritual beings in heavens. If we think of the whole of existence as an immense ocean, then the human being is its most precious pearl. If the universe is an exhibition hall, with all its glories on display, then the human being is its appreciating visitor. If things and events are a captivating harmony of balances, then the human being is the sensitive spectator. In the light of faith-oriented thought and the healthy consciousness of humanity, existence, which used to seem quiet and surrounded by darkness, has been illuminated, and it has gained beauty-making our hearts feel as if we were in Paradise. Until the time when humanity ascended to their throne on Earth, the angels and other spiritual beings bore the flag that proclaimed the truth on the horizons of the spiritual realm. The flag, honored by the advent of humanity, started to wave in the heights of the mortal realm, and this globe-so small when compared to the skies-has become equal with the heavens by becoming the horizon of the realms beyond. Humanity has always been the crown of creation; this has been true for as long as faith has been the source of joy, for as long as Islam has been the code of life,1 for as long as the knowledge of God and love have been the inner dynamics. The Earth is dependent on the light that is diffused by humanity . . . this light has been granted by the Almighty, out of His special favor. This special favor has honored humanity, making it the rarest of roses in this garden of beauty. Imam al-Ghazali2 described this elegance in the following way; “the present creation cannot be more aesthetic, beautiful, or fascinating.” Humanity can be seen as the sole nightingale of this world, a world which is but a shadow of Paradise.

It would not be an exaggeration to say that these galleries-nestled one within the other-have been arranged and designed solely for humanity. It would not be an overstatement to say that this world has been created as the garden for this rarest of roses, or that the sea of existence has been created as the womb of this pearl; rather it would be a modest expression of the true state of things. As a matter of fact, the whole of existence, in a way, has been interpreted and voiced in unison via humanity, for humanity, and at humanity’s service; it is virtually dependent upon humanity; and in terms of humanity’s dependence upon the Creator Who has yielded everything to the command of humanity, such an intense relationship is felt between humanity and God that the purpose of all of creation can be nothing other than humankind and their servanthood to God.

In fact, the needs of humanity are so extensive that they cover all of creation, and are so deep that they extend to eternity. Above all, human beings have been created for eternity, and they long for it. The wishes and demands of human beings are boundless and their expectations are infinite. Even if the whole world were to be given to humanity, its appetite would not be satisfied nor would its ambitions cease. Explicitly or not, human souls expect another eternal abode, not to mention the fact that they hanker for the continuation of this transient world. Anybody who owns a heart that is open to the truth wishes to see Paradise-which is no more than an insignificant shadow of His Grandeur, and they wish to see the Exalted Creator in all His magnificence and beauty.

People who can feel and sense the truth in the facet of things and occurrences, and who are aware of their position in the universe are on this journey. At the same time, these people are appreciative of themselves and are open to showing respect for their Lord. As for those in opposition, they cannot be said to feel respect for either themselves or for their Lord. Moreover, they cannot even recognize their Lord as they should. Even if they should do so by chance, they are not able to glorify Him as His Greatness requires. Attaining true humanity depends on the recognition of the relationship between the Lord and His servants. Paradoxically, human beings, who are considered to be more blessed than the angels in terms of their potential, are likely to sink lower than the most contemptible of beings if they do not sense or appreciate this relation; this is stated in the verse: . . . those are like cattle, or rather are even more misguided. (Al-Araf 7:179)

The recognition of this association, which is generally phrased as belief, is a position through which a human being can attain virtual humanity, and from which they can ascend above all other creatures. As for disbelief, another term that indicates the lack of such an association, it turns human beings into beasts. Societies formed by such individuals suffer from severe resentment, fury, lust, greed, mendacity, hypocrisy, envy, deception, and intrigue; that is, disbelief creates societies in which everyone must be on alert. In any case, the people who have yielded to these evil habits can never be recognized as being a nation or a society, rather they can merely be described as being non-conscious masses. When Diogenes was searching for a human being in the street during the daytime with the aid of a lantern, he was probably trying to counsel or show his reaction against such people. Mark Orel, the author of Thoughts, another person who reflects the same idea from a different perspective, says “Every morning, when I join other people, I think to myself: ‘Today, I will meet some beasts in human form again. If I reach the evening without startling them or without being bitten by any of them, I will consider myself happy.” Rabi‘a al-‘Adawiya took a more serious and reactionary approach to the matter: “I hardly ever see a human on the street. What I see are some foxes in front of shops, some wolves and other creatures snarling at each other. . . . For a moment, I saw a half-human and I arranged my veil regarding him,” Obviously, these people do not intend to condemn all members of humanity. Rather, they are trying to depict the inner worlds of those who have turned their inherent human values into selfishness. If people do not control their behavior according to the purpose of their creation or control their inner worlds with respect to their outward appearance in an effort to eliminate inconsistencies, then they are quite likely to appear as those described by Mark Orel and Rabi‘a al-‘Adawiya.

Among these people you can sometimes come across people whose visage appears to be cheerful even though they are miserable inside. They, too, are another type. One philosopher has compared them to a building with two different sides. Its facade is clean, splendid, and impressive, whereas the side facing the rear is dirty, shabby, and derelict. When we see such a building on the street, we say “very nice,” making a pre-judgment. When we examine the other side, however, we condemn the building that we so eagerly praised a few minutes before. The same is true for people. We will always be misled if we evaluate them from a single aspect. What matters is to see them as they really are and to make some efforts to improve their rear walls, as well as considering them in accordance with their good sides.

Human beings are the children of their own attributes and attitudes. We can judge which characteristic or attribute is dominant according to the behavior that a person demonstrates, good or evil. Sometimes people can turn into monsters, ready to bite those closest to them. Sometimes people turn into “Josephs,” their faces shining like the moon, illuminating the dungeon, and rendering it a corridor to Heaven. Sometimes they become so pure that even the angels envy them. And sometimes they are so wicked that even the devils feel ashamed.

Human beings can sometimes become so heavenly that they reach the height of the skies; yet sometimes they are so mean that they become worse than snakes or venomous insects. Human beings are creatures who can demonstrate such a wide range of behavior that they can possess corrupt qualities alongside their merits; and they can be readily tempted to evil, in spite of possessing lofty virtues. Faith, wisdom, love, and spiritual pleasures are as much a part of them as their own hearts are; loving others, embracing everyone, living with feelings of kindness and making others live with the same is the ultimate goal of their lives. Eliminating evil through goodness, loving “love,” and being in a constant struggle against feelings of enmity are as sweet to them as the whisper of their own soul. Evil feelings, such as greed, resentment, hatred, lust, slander, mendacity, hypocrisy, corruption, opportunism, egoism, cowardliness, and ambition stalk them stealthily, waiting for a weak moment. They might be seized by evil feelings and passions, becoming enslaved by them, making them evil to the utmost degree, in spite of the fact that the same people have the potential to be the masters of the universes through their virtues and good behavior. Even if such a person may seem to be free, in reality they are the most enslaved; freedom can only be achieved by success in the inner struggle-a struggle termed “the greater jihad” in Islam. Improvement of the inherent potential and the attainment of a second nature that is open to a relationship with the Almighty depend on success in this struggle, a struggle that takes place deep in the soul, on whether or not those undergoing the struggle appreciate this victory, and on whether or not they bend their heads to the level of their feet, forming a circle in their modesty and humility.

The weak-willed, who are unable to pass beyond superficiality to look into their inner depths, to see the gaps and defects within their nature as well as the merits of their souls, and who are unable to restore themselves every new day, can never progress in their inner worlds. Even if they continue to talk about making progress, whenever they try to step forwards they slide ever backwards. Such people cannot manage to rid their eyes, ears, tongues, lips, hands, or feet of their captivity to their own egos; they live as slaves throughout their lives without even being aware of this tragic fact. To tell the truth, these people, mere slaves of their corporeal desires, are in a pitiable condition.

To love and care for those who preserve and improve their humanity is to give them what they deserve. As for the rest, they should be shown love and sympathy so that they can be saved from the grasp of their evil feelings and passions. Such an attitude is an expression of caring for human beings, whom God created as worthy of respect . . . and the human being is an entity created to be loved. 

Notes

1. The faith revealed to humankind starting with Adam has always been the same; the faith has been perfected with Prophet Muhammad and the Qur’an, and it was given the name Islam by God.
2. Imam al-Ghazali (1058-1111): An important Muslim jurist, who came to be known as Hujjat al-Islam (Proof of Islam). He is considered to be the Reviver of the fifth Islamic century. Ihya’ ‘Ulum al-Din [Reviving the Religious Sciences] is his most celebrated work.

Men and women have different natures that are designed for the duties they are optimized to perform in this life. This difference in natures necessitates different egos as their origin. As witnessed by history, man has an exclusive ego, whereas woman has a rather inclusive ego.¹ In other words, man’s ego leads to a rather self-centered life where communities are composed of distinct individuals, whereas woman’s ego leads to a rather communal life in which the community is considered as the image of one’s self.² This comparison shows that the properties of ego are very densely packed in every male; this is shown by his individualistic character. So, it is easier to understand the nature and impacts of ego by studying men.

In order to identify the two essential aspects of the ego, consider the following questions: Why are women more likely to go to the doctor, if ill, while men drag their feet, refusing to go until it is the final resort? Why are women more likely to ask for directions when they feel lost, while men try as hard as possible not to ask for help? Why do women ask for an expert to fix or assemble something, but men keep working until they are stuck and there is no way out other than calling an expert? Why do men get angry when they are told what they should and how they should do it, both at the same time?

These questions reveal the instinct for self-sufficiency and freedom, which are two essential aspects of the ego. They are very strongly interrelated; so much so that violation of one means violation of the other, or acceptance of one requires acceptance of the other. This relation is explained as follows (Figure 1): Motivated by the instinct of self-sufficiency, the ego does not want to accept its insufficiencies, because an acceptance of insufficiencies requires being open to seeking help from other people; but, receiving help means attachment, hence a violation of freedom. Alternatively, motivated by the instinct of freedom, the ego does not want to accept a power that defines boundaries for its actions because obeying a power means acceptance of weakness, hence insufficiency.

Although men and women are not exactly the same in terms of ego, both of them still carry individuality; and this individuality has the aforementioned instincts. Self-sufficiency and freedom, when used properly, can yield loyal partners that help each other stand together in order to accomplish their life goals. When left untamed and uneducated, self-sufficiency and freedom lead to arrogance, selfishness, and so, a miserable married life. In the long run, uneducated egos become overwhelmed by these instincts and easily break off their relationships with their partners. Therefore, effort must be spent in order to moderate and guide them. 

Let’s ponder over the following example to shed some light on this matter. The forging or shaping of industrial metals requires high temperatures and/or high pressure. If the temperature is high enough to melt the metal, then it can be poured into the mold to give it the desired shape. If the temperature is not high enough, then high pressure is needed to shape the metal; however, the higher the temperature, the lower the pressure required to shape the metal.

Educating the ego means shaping the character of a person; so it involves the shaping of the ego. Similar to the above example, the education of the ego has two main energy sources: heat due to love and pressure due to fear. If the heat of love is enough to melt the ego, then it is very easy to shape the personality. For this reason, most men become a different person when they fall in love. But, if the heat of love is not enough to melt the ego, then the pressure of fear is necessary to make the needed modifications. The source of fear can change from person to person (e.g. fear of God, fear of loneliness, fear of losing dignity, etc.), and fear can manifest itself in another form, which is respect. Whatever the source of the fear is, and however this fear manifests itself, it must be aimed to protect the stability of the relation between the spouses by enabling modifications in the characters as required by the situation.

Use of the fear factor for ego education comes into the picture mostly in later periods of marriages when passionate love has faded and the actual personalities of the individuals are in play. Hence, it is especially in this part of the marriage that an extra effort is required for the successful continuity of the relationship. This effort is called the art of married life. It is an art that reveals the beauties and powers hidden in the hearts; an art that keeps the two instincts of the ego, i.e. self-sufficiency and freedom, under control and guides them. The art of married life involves human specific issues, gender specific issues, and principles needed to maintain mutual harmony. 

I. Human Nature

The subjects that are discussed in this section include the key points that are the same for both men and women.

The past life

The past life of a person has an impact on why that person acts the way they do. Therefore, individuals must learn about their partners’ life stories to achieve a mutual understanding. The knowledge of the past life has two components: the pre-birth family background, and the atmosphere consisting of the parents, siblings, and friends. The pre-birth family background has to do with the conditions that the baby is born into. The financial, social, and psychological states of the family influence the parents’ attitudes towards their child. On top of these states, the parents’ past lives compose the unspoken psychological messages given to the child. For this reason, understanding the parents is an important clue to understanding a person. The multi-component atmosphere of the surrounding people determines the conditions under which the innate personality of the person interacts all throughout their life. This interaction instructs the child what the norms and traditions of society are; these in turn motivate and limit the actions of the individual.

As a result of experiences in the past, a person develops a character,³ which becomes a wall in front of the real nature (innate character) of that person. Therefore, when you are interacting with someone, it is their acquired character that you are dealing with, rather than the innate character from birth. So, it is extremely important to learn about and understand this secondary personality in order to comply with it. The knowledge of the past also makes it easier to have patience in the face of problems and to act compassionately and wisely.

The innate character

This is the God-given character or nature of the person.³ The ego realizes itself in this world through the properties of this character. The individuals who know their innate characters are happy and content in their lives. Success in married life, also, strongly depends on how well the innate character is understood and utilized in the relation. The couples must learn about their own and their partner’s innate character and act accordingly in order to achieve a satisfying and happy marriage.

Because of the past life, the innate personality might have been injured and/or suppressed. The spouses at the beginning of their relationship find the loving and accepting atmosphere needed by the innate character to reveal itself and heal its wounds. However, neither the individual nor the partner knows at the beginning how to properly use or guide these newly emerging properties. It takes time to accord them with respect to each other. So, arguments are imminent in this transitional period as a result of mal-adjusted attitudes.

If the innate character is further suppressed, instead of letting it emerge, this can cause deeper psychological and psychosomatic complications in the long run, such as aggressive attitudes towards family members, or deep and extremely long sleep as a form of self-rejection from the situation. Furthermore, the suppression of the innate character can yield uncontrolled psychological messages that are transferred to the children. These hidden messages can have positive or negative effects on the offspring depending on the psychology of the parent. Sometimes they are like underground mines, which produce much that is of benefit as they are uncovered; and sometimes they act like a second subconscious control mechanism for the person that makes up an aggressive and/or distrustful character.

Both the emergence and the suppression of the innate character have potential dangers. However, when treated properly, the emergence of the innate character is beneficial in the long run. The wise way is to try to be patient with each other so that the partners can realize their innate characters and balance them properly to become more contributing members of the family and the society.

Search for the everlasting love

Every person has a natural instinct to find an everlasting love⁴ that is going to satisfy them in all senses. This instinct is best depicted by the famous expression “live happily ever after”; something that almost never happens: the story always ends at the wedding and the rest is assumed to be irrelevant. Life is full of ups and downs, and no human is ever capable of completely satisfying the heart of another. This is because the heart demands an everlasting love if it is to be satisfied. Therefore, individuals must accept the vast volume of the heart⁴ and the limited capability of the human being. This acceptance has two implications: a person should not expect the other partner to completely satisfy their heart, and a person should not try to completely satisfy their partner’s heart. A person can at most try to do their best in this way; and as a matter of fact, they must try their best.

Hidden love agreement

Every person has a hidden love agreement. This agreement is a sub-conscious list of conditions that form during their past life. If a person was deprived of something that is required by their innate character, then they are going to look for it in their future life. Any behavior that satisfies this need carries the message of love for that person. On the other hand, the innate character of the individual also shapes the ways in which they can receive and give love, hence the language of love.⁵ Therefore, the innate character of the person and its interaction with the past life experiences determine the content of the hidden love agreement. When an individual feels that they are loved by someone, the hidden love agreement is automatically and subconsciously activated. This means that the other partner is expected to do certain things and behave in certain ways that they are not aware of. Due to lack of awareness of this hidden agreement, both partners may violate the conditions therein. The feelings of being ignored and being dissatisfied with the relationship as a result of these violations lead to conflicts and arguments. As a remedy to the situation, individuals must become aware of the existence of this hidden agreement both for themselves and for their partners, learn about their contents, and act accordingly.

Continuous development

The ego is like a seed furnished with much potential; and this potential burgeons as time proceeds. Also, the past experiences are like seeds that are sown into the soil of sub-conscience; they sprout over time. Some of these sprouts emerge during childhood, whereas some arise during adolescence and still others erupt in maturity and old age. As a result, the person that an individual encounters changes continuously as the relationship progresses. If these sprout-like changes in the personality are not followed and controlled both by the individual and the partner, they are going to grow and exercise their capabilities. These capabilities will require new things to work on and new opportunities to flourish. This situation can lead to dissatisfaction with the current state of the relationship, which may be harmful unless treated patiently.

II. Differences between Men and Women

Men and women have different laws that constitute their worlds. In order to achieve balance and harmony between the partners, the differences and similarities between these laws must be understood well.

Need for solitude

Men have a natural need for solitude,6 although it can be at different levels. This natural need is because of their individualized egos, which require freedom and self-sufficiency. Being alone is a way for man to resolve the problems in his mind, a means to free himself from the narrow limits of the routine and relax. Women, on the other hand, need company for several reasons, such as relieving their stress or carrying out an activity, which is in accordance with their more social ego. The contradiction of the needs at this point can easily cause arguments between men and women. A man will start complaining about not having enough freedom and bearing pressure being put on them at home. As a reaction, a woman will start complaining about negligence and the reluctance of her husband to give time to the family. It is extremely important for both partners to understand the other’s point of view; the woman must understand that a man whose need for loneliness is satisfied will soon come back without further effort.⁶ Men, on the other hand, must understand that a wife whose need for company is satisfied will happily let her husband alone.

Reading between the lines

Women in particular tend to use words or actions as veils to their actual sentiments. Consider the following example:⁶ In case of distress or sorrow, the wife may start picking on her husband about very simple things; she may reflect a small problem as a precursor to a gigantic problem. Upon being exposed to such attitudes, the husband may take guard and either start defending himself or try to convince his wife that she is exaggerating the situation. In either case, the wife will get the message that ‘I don’t care about your problem, your feelings are wrong,’ which is a destructive answer to her concealed request to talk. What is necessary is a little bit of patience and some time to be together and listen. There can be other instances where the actual feelings are disguised by aggressive attitudes, and it is incumbent on the man to decipher them.

Principle of uncertainty

The principle of uncertainty is well known among the quantum physicists. Considering the subject of this article, it can be interpreted as follows: it is impossible to define the state of an entity with infinite precision; the more you learn about an aspect of that entity, the less you are allowed to learn about other aspects. This principle applies to the psychology of men and women as follows. Both men and women have an instinct for uncertainty at times due to their psychological needs. However, the motive for uncertainty is different for men and women. The husband wants to seem uncertain to his wife because he wants to escape to his solitude. The wife, on the other hand, tends to exhibit uncertainty to her partner because she wants to be pursued continuously. It is clear from this explanation that the driving force for the same kind of behavior, i.e. uncertainty, is completely contradictory for each. So, if a woman assumes that the driving force for the uncertainty of her husband is the same as hers and tries to follow her husband in every mood or at every moment, then she is going to be violating the rule of uncertainty for men. If, on the other hand, a man, assuming that the needs of his wife are the same as his, leaves his wife alone, then he is going to be acting completely opposite to her expectations. Therefore, men must be treated as men, and women must be treated as women.

III. Principles of Conservation

The principles of conservation form the substrate by which the human-specific and the gender-specific characters can be exercised in harmony.

Purpose of life

A purpose in the lives of the partners may stimulate harmony in the family, especially if this is shared by both partners. A common life goal, or in other words, a unity of purpose may induce self-sacrifice and compassion for each other as required by the circumstances.⁷ For many families, raising children serves as a purpose of life and functions as a unifying factor in the family. The parents try to overcome the difficulties of outside world or problems in their relationships for the sake of their children. However, apart from the children, people can have other goals in their lives, such as volunteer, social, or religious services. Such activities are going to add meaning to or increase the quality of life, which in turn brings contentment and stability to the family.

Love

It is important to know and accept that passionate love, mature love, and compassion are not identical. Moreover, passionate love, which is the one that young people in particular seek relentlessly, is the least persistent and short-lived among the three. Mature love, on the other hand, lasts longer and it acts as the soil from which passionate love flourishes like a flower every spring. The common property of passionate love and mature love is that both require a return from the beloved. Compassion is, in contrast, the highest level of love⁸ which does not ask for any recompense from the loved one: mothers’ love for their children is an example of this. For the stability of the relationship in a family, compassion must take its essential place eventually.⁹ If compassion is not well inculcated in the hearts of the partners by the time passionate love and mature love weaken, the relationship is going to be past the limits of stability for further continuation.

Mutual respect

Couples tend to lose their mutual respect over time. This corrosive effect of time on their respect for each other is due to the ‘familiarization’ process between the partners. Familiarization takes place during the times when they learn about each other’s pluses and minuses, and when they are exposed to their private. As a result, the spouses no longer appear as exciting to one another, and they may forget how valuable they are to one another. This atmosphere is suitable for certain kinds of violations to take place, as explained below. The arguments that break out for a sensible reason may evolve into an aggressive ego competition in which the spouses unfairly criticize each other with inappropriate words. Unless resolved in peace, these conflicts may lead the spouses explaining each other’s faults or deficiencies to other relatives and/or friends. As a result, a fair argument at the beginning may grow into an unfair clash in which mutual regard for honor is violated. Every individual has a private space in the physical world and in the psychological/mental world. These private spaces can only be occupied with the consent of the individual. Filling up the partner’s desk or room space with things that don’t belong to them is an example of the violation of physical space. Forcing the other partner to feel the same feelings and share the same ideas is, on the other hand, an example of violation of psychological/mental space. Both of these violations are likely to occur not necessarily due to bad intentions, but more as a consequence of the comfort brought by mutual love. So, it is important not to push for the occupation of the individual spaces as a price for the love given to the partner. Every individual has different sensitivities at different levels. A pleasant and loving atmosphere can be felt in the family if the spouses do not violate each other’s sensitivities. It is usual that people try to be careful about the sensitivities of the people they have recently met. Yet they, unfortunately, tend to neglect those they have known for a long time and who are close. This applies to spouses, too, as they progress into their marriage. Neglect of sensitivities may result in uncontrolled nervous eruptions, which can spark unnecessary arguments. The effort to be careful about sensitivities, on the other hand, will pay off as the unparalleled peace at home. In summary, for a healthy relationship, the following three kinds of respect must be preserved: respect for honor, respect for individual space, and respect for sensitivities.

Strength of criteria

It is essential to have a sense of strength and dispensability of the rules coming from several sources, such as tradition, religion, personal sensitivities… Life can require giving up some habits or violating some rules for the sake of others. People may be obliged to make sacrifices in certain things in order to save others. In order to keep the integrity of the family and the integrity of personal character, it is best for every individual to have a reasonable order of priority when making compromises and sacrifices.

Mutual complaint evaluation

It is recommended that the individuals either prepare a list of complaints about each other and discuss it, or ask for criticism from their partners at times.⁵ This can help the partners look at themselves from an outside perspective and adjust their attitudes as required by the circumstances. However, not everybody can do this kind of exercise, since listening and accepting errors is not a ubiquitous virtue. In such cases, so as not to trigger another conflict due to criticism, asking for help from a reliable person that is respected by the other partner may be a solution at this point.

Conclusion

The egos that make up a family must act in coherence so that the solidarity between the individuals persists against the erosive inclinations of the ego that desires to attain self-sufficiency and freedom. The art of married life helps moderate and guide these inclinations of the ego for a happy and continued relationship. Every couple must strive to perform this art so that freedom and self-sufficiency do not govern the attitudes of the spouses and lead to destruction of the marriage. Acknowledgment I would like to thank my wife for her valuable views in our discussions on the subject.

Notes

1. Tannen, D., You just don’t Understand: Women and Men in Conversation, pp. 24-25, Ballantine Books.
2. Nursi, S., 20th Flash, Flashes, pp. 206, Sozler Publications.
3. Aydin, S., Karakter egitiminde mizac (Personality and character education), Sizinti, No:299, Dec. 2003, pp. 533-537.
4. Nursi, 3rd Flash, Flashes, pp. 29-30.
5. http://www.fivelovelanguages.com
6. Gray, J., Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus.
7. Nursi, 21st Flash, Flashes, pp. 214.
8. Nursi, S., 8th Letter, Letters 1, pp. 34, Truestar Publications.
9. Nursi, S., 10th Word, Words 1, pp. 125-126, Kaynak Publications Virginia Psychology, Philosophy.

In our essay, we will briefly introduce Wach’s basic understanding of each of the four concepts, namely teacher, student, master, and disciple, and then elaborate, examining in detail some of the perspectives. At the same time, we will try to look at some different aspects of the subject upon which Joachim Wach did not focus.

According to Wach, the teacher is the possessor of certain crafts, for example, knowledge in a certain subject or of a skill, and he teaches what he knows or possesses to his students. Therefore, he it is not his person itself that is respected by the student, rather it is his knowledge or skill. On the other hand, the very character and participation of the master are crucial in the learning process; therefore, it is not his knowledge or skill that is admired and esteemed by the disciple, but rather his very essence and individuality. Consequently, while the teacher is considered as a replaceable object in the educational process, the master is regarded as an essential component.

The teacher provides only knowledge, ability, or a definite subject matter, and his merit consists in his willingness to give freely. On the other hand, to give is also a kind of merit for the master, but he gives something different to his disciples from what the teacher gives to his students. The master gives himself to his disciples and consumes himself. However, the teacher lives for a certain task and gives a certain craft; consequently, he is consumed by his task.

The student respects the teacher as a body of knowledge and the teacher-student relationship exists in the common interest that is the subject matter. The disciple is interested in the personality of the master rather than his knowledge. For that reason, the master-disciple relationship survives in different interests; that is to say, while the master’s interest is the student himself, the student’s concern is the master’s very existence. On that ground, the master and disciple have an irreplaceable value for one another, while in the teacher-student relationship, both components are replaceable.

When the student opens himself to the teacher, he makes himself dear, and his value depends on his success or failure in the subject. The sharpness and intelligence of the student stimulates the praise of the teacher. On the other hand, for the master, the sharp eye or the intellect of the disciple makes no difference. Moreover, being a disciple is not based on personal worth, but is rather a relationship in which a fellowship of destiny is predominant.

After introducing the main nuances of the teacher-student and the master-disciple relationships, as Wach perceives them, let us elaborate on some points that are given only a brief mention in Wach’s paper.

One of the points that Wach explores concerning comparison between teacher and master is time. Wach asserts that the teacher is worried about time, especially its passing, while the master’s concern focuses on the moment. The teacher has much to teach and wants to have completed his task at the end of the course. He wants his students to graduate so that they can go out and teach what they have been taught. However, the master has no concern about when his disciples will complete his course, because the right time for the matriculation of the disciple cannot be determined in advance. In other words, the right time can be at any moment. Consequently, each moment is a treasure for both the master and the disciple in this learning process; the right knowledge or the gnosis-in the Sufi sense-can be given and obtained at any moment.

Moreover, the teacher teaches a certain type of knowledge or skill; therefore, his course must end at a certain time period. However, the master teaches of himself and provides knowledge of life; therefore, this teaching phase may last for a life time.

Approached from a different angle, time is a valuable concept in the teacher-student relationship only when the teacher teaches, as this relationship is based on teaching and learning. On the other hand, time is a valuable component in the master-disciple relationship, because even the master’s silence or a look can be a great method of teaching. In other words, the master-disciple relationship is not based solely on certain actions.

When we look at the issue from the perspective of the student and the disciple, we can determine that students plan that they will give a certain time period to their teacher, but the disciples are ready to sacrifice their whole life to their master. The students are worried about the passing of the time; this is not a fault. Yet, the disciples do not worry about time; if they do worry, it means that they feel a great need to spend much time with their master.

Another issue that Wach raises in his paper is about the future of students and disciples. He asserts that the student will become a teacher, but the disciple will never become a master. Wach states that as the master’s existence is irreplaceable, the disciple can never take the place of his master. On the other hand, the teacher is not unique; therefore, the student can replace him. Agreeing with Wach about this specific idea, we also would like to say that although the disciple cannot replace his master, he certainly can become a master and there are many examples of this in the history of the master-disciple relationship. For instance, one of the famous Sufi masters, Abdussalam b. Mashish, had only one disciple during his whole life, Shazili, through whom he gained fame. This was because Shazili, after his master Ibn Mashish, also became a great master and founded the Shazili Sufi order. As the example shows, the disciple can never be his master, but he can be a master who carries on the tradition.

One of the distinctions between discipleship and studentship that Wach makes is that while discipleship drives the disciples to envy and jealousy, studentship is usually a base for mutual love. This stems from the fact that in the master-disciple relationship, the master’s very existence is the sole interest of all the disciples; therefore, they are unable to share him. On the other hand, in the teacher-student relationship, the common interest of the students is the subject matter; therefore, students usually do not experience any problem in terms of sharing. Agreeing with these contentions of Wach, we also would like to add that although discipleship usually becomes a base for jealousy, the masters do not desire that their disciples feel jealousy towards each other.

One of the great masters was Said Nursi, who lived in Turkey and died in 1960. He had a very different approach to the disciple-master relationship. Nursi’s significance rests in the very core of his teachings. In his teaching, he creates a completely new concept called fana fi’l-ikhwan and according to this concept, disciples must annihilate themselves in their fellow disciples instead of annihilating themselves in the character of the master. This mutual annihilation that occurs between disciples is called tafani and both these concepts, fana fi’l-ikhwan and tafani are fundamental in the teachings of Nursi.

One of the points that Wach should have dealt with more clearly in his paper is the emotional nature of the master-disciple relationship. For us, the master-student relationship is a relationship of compassion-love. As Wach points out, the master’s very concern is humanity; it is through his sacred knowledge that the master can perceive the ability of humanity to live cheerfully and painlessly. Therefore, the master willingly takes on the role of savior and bravely says ‘Yes’ to his destiny. His soul is willing to be sacrificed. Apparently, the main emotion that rests in the soul that accepts sacrifice is compassion; the master’s group of disciples is a small sample of humanity, so therefore, the master is always compassionate to his disciples. He cares for them deeply; lives and dies for them. On the other hand, the disciple returns this compassion with his deep love.

To elaborate on the compassion of the master, we can say that the master’s compassion toward his disciples, thereby, toward humanity, contains three main emotions: protection, endurance, and sacrifice. The relationship of the master to his disciples is like that of a mother to her children. Therefore, the master is always worried about the security of his disciples. The security that we talk about here is generally not a physical one. Since the master is aware that the life of humanity is generally cheerful and painless, he wants to protect his disciples from this type of life style. The master knows and deeply believes that such an easy life is a dead and void life.

The master’s heart burns to protect his disciples, in particular the young disciples who are usually not aware of the great dangers that await them. It is due to this unawareness that they are sometimes unable to display obedience to the advice of the master. When this happens, the master’s position becomes a very heavy burden to bear, but his compassion towards the disciples provides for him the endurance that he needs.

The last main nuance of the master’s compassion is his saying “Yes” to his destiny. As soon as the master obtains his sacred knowledge, he becomes aware of his sacrificial destiny. He knows that his task is very difficult and this task may even drive him to his death. There is no other choice for him but to say “Yes” to his death. He is able to do this because of his incomprehensible compassion. At this point, although Wach sees death as the greatest sacrifice of the master, we disagree; perceiving rather that living for the sake of humanity and enduring the difficulties of the task is a greater sacrifice for the master than the acceptance of death. The difficulties that the master accepts and bears throughout his life are heavier than death itself. It is for this reason that Mawlana Jalaladdin Rumi and many others call death Shab-i Arus, “the wedding night.” It is on this night that the lover meets his beloved and the master meets his Lord; for the master, death is the end of suffering.

While the master’s compassion contains protection, endurance, and sacrifice, the love of the disciples contains respect and obedience. The following quote from Ibn Arabi symbolizes the respect of the disciples toward their master: “When I would sit before him [Abu Ya’qub al-Qumi] or before others of my Shaykhs, I would tremble like a leaf in the wind, my voice would become weak and my limbs would shake.” The respect that the disciples display for their master stems from their deep love. The other main reflection of that deep love is obedience. Although the disciples are aware of the benefits of obeying their master, these benefits are not the main reason for their obedience. Rather, such obedience arises out of their love.

Regarding this obedience, in Sufism the disciple is considered to be as a corpse in the hands of the person washing the body in preparation for burial.

In conclusion, the subject that Wach deals with in his paper is a complicated subject, and there may well be many other aspects that need to be discussed, yet it should be stated that Wach seems to have accomplished much in this field. A university professor, Wach, if not a master, certainly stands at the boundary between the realms of the master and the teacher realms.