It was 3:45 pm. I was sitting crossed-legged with twenty other seven-year olds under a wall of flat glass windows. An eerie calm had settled outside, where a short time before there had been whipping winds and a sky as green as Kermit the Frog. My mom whisked into the building, her sensible yet fashionable heels clicking on the worn linoleum, and the petals of her flowered dress rippling with her gait. Shocked that I was not huddled in an enclosed room, she took one look at my position under the windows and told me it was time to go. That was the last time I ever saw my after-school program. Everyone knows not to take cover under glass during a tornado.

On the way home, my mom angled the car around downed branches the width of tree trunks and garbage cans lolling down the curb. The world was spent: siding dangled from the edge of condos, and telephone poles were precariously tilted, if they stood at all. People ambled about, assessing the damage as the neighborhood settled into a collective sigh. A policeman at the end of the lane directed traffic to make only a right turn onto the main street because of downed power lines to the left, the direction of our house. My mom said, exasperated, “Now we’ll never get home!” My mom, always tough and calm, was worried. It wasn’t until that moment that I got scared too.

We did, eventually, make our way to our still-intact home. Thinking back on that moment, one of a few post-tornado moments during my Indiana childhood, I note most how my fear was derived from my parents’ fear. I always felt safe and happy when at their side, but in the rare moments when they were fearful, I became beside myself with terror.

When I was growing up my mom and I would sometimes watch horror movies while sitting on our worn, brown suede couch. When the background music began its inevitable, this-is-the-scariest-part crescendo, I would turn my head 90 degrees to the right and look straight into my mom’s eyes. For the entire duration, my mom would calmly report that the masked man was bludgeoning the babysitter or wryly observe, “Oh, looks like the psycho wasn’t dead after all.” Sometimes she’d insert an, “Ew, gross!” exclamation when something bloody took her by surprise. I got all the emotion I could handle by looking into her eyes during those parts; she became a sort of “closed captioning” for me—recapping what my senses wouldn’t let me experience first-hand.

When I was a child and swam competitively for years with the local swim club, my parents attended every swim meet I participated in. They would sweat it out on the hot bleachers of the indoor pool deck, fanning themselves as they sat for hours in the backless bleachers waiting for my race to begin. If I became nervous before my event, as I always did, I’d scan the population of faces in ordered rows until I found my parents. My dad, always looking for me, would catch my eye and give me a thumbs up with a double eyebrow raise and a big smile for support. I would immediately feel relief and was instantly braver because he believed in me.

When I graduated from my small-town college and decided to move to New York City without a job, a friend, or a long-term place to stay, my parents took care not to discourage me. Instead, they threw an early birthday party for me and did the tough thing—they bought me luggage, in acceptance that I had to live my dreams, even if they took me far away from family. Upon unpacking that luggage, I found a tiny yellow post-it that my parents and older sister signed that said, “Love ya!!!” with each of their familiar signatures surrounding it. Beneath it was a card that said, “You Must Take Your Chance.” Never once did they remind me of my shy demeanor or annoying tendency to throw up repeatedly when travelling on my own. Never once did they ask me to stay with them forever, even though their eyes might have mentioned it.

 As an adult, I still gauge fear by my parents’ eyes. A few years ago, during a phone call that bridged the 1000-mile gap between our homes, my mom told me my dad was diagnosed with a brain tumor. She spoke flatly, like a tiny person standing in the mouth of a huge cave, every syllable clear and solitary. There were no reverberations, no hints of emotion. I tried to be the echo of her stillness. But when I arrived at my parent’s house and looked into my mom’s eyes, I knew we were in trouble.

The night before my dad’s brain surgery, he and I sat in cushioned deck chairs on the shaded back porch of the house. He looked intently into my face and asked if I thought he was doing the right thing by having surgery and if I thought he was going to be okay. His doctor had given him 6-12 months to live and flatly stated that this condition had a high mortality rate. Surgery could buy him time, but most likely he would not survive. My dad’s tumor gave him short term memory loss, so he forgot all of that. What he remembered was that he trusted me. What I knew was that every moment we’re given here on earth, we are living. If there was even a one percent chance that my dad would live, what’s to say he wouldn’t be in that one percent? Sitting on the porch that night, I breathed in, collecting all the calm I could from the cheerful summer day, erased fear from my face, and answered, “You’ve improved so much in this past week on medicine alone. I think you’re going to be fine.”

After his surgery, my mom, sister, and I walked down the hallway to see my dad in the intensive care unit. I have a nauseous fear of hospitals, one I inherited from my dad: a feeling that the hallway is too long, that the patients behind the floor-to-ceiling windows are unprotected so near to the thin glass walls, their bodies storming inside. We shakily entered Dad’s room, and he smiled at us and groggily said, “I feel fine,” then crossed his eyes and stuck out his tongue to prove his normalcy. I relaxed, seeing his face, seeing he was okay. I think he did it for that reason.

I guess that is what love is—reassuring each other in the eye of a storm, being the wall of calm and protective peace within the whirl of a tornado.

Adam forgot, so did his children.

How does our brain store information? How is it possible to make learning faster and easier? Is there any way not to forget what we have learned and to remember things more easily? Of what importance is the fact that information is never deleted from our memory, even if we have forgotten it? These are among many of the questions for which answers have been sought over the years.

Memory is one of the functions of the brain and it is defined as the ability to preserve acquired information consciously and relate it to the past. It is not just a certain portion of the brain, but rather the entire organ that functions in storing, processing, and retrieving external and internal signals. Signals that build up our memory are what we usually perceive through our five senses. When we burn our hand, or see or experience a traffic accident , when we are given a compliment and many other events are all examples of external signals, whereas internal signals are related to our nervous system or imagination. The pain one feels during a heart attack, the anxiety of a cold sweat, or a beautiful daydream are all stored in our memory too. We may or may not remember them. There is no deletion; it is simply that we do not remember. Forgetting is a state that is encoded in our makeup with differing degrees, depending on the kind of life the person has experienced. Age, gender, stress, habits, and illnesses all have varying roles in forgetting.

Short-term memory

Short-term memory refers to saving and remembering what we have learned a few seconds or minutes ago; the prefrontal brain is the location for this temporary processing. Signals are kept in this portion of the brain for a few seconds and then conveyed to the back stage (as in the transfer of data from the cache memory to the main memory in computers). We tend to quickly forget those things on which we have not spent a long time or to which we have not assigned great importance, even though we can understand them. Imagine how unbearable our life would be if we were to store in our memories and remember things in infinite detail like the color of the wall we are facing, the variety of the objects around us and their qualities, the air we breathe in and out, or every beat of our heart. The signals that come to our brain within a certain time frame are filtered according to our needs and their significance and limitations are applied depending on their qualities and quantities.

There is no consolidation processing for short term memory. Second or minutes after signals are received they are retrieved in accordance with what we need; if they are insignificant for us, they are forgotten in the same amount of time. The information that is significant for the person is consolidated in the hippocampus and reserved in mid and long-term memory units.

Mid and long term memory

After being processed in the sub-cortex (limbic system) of the brain, signals are saved. Depending on their level of urgency, the meaning they stand for, and their emotional effect, signals are saved in either the mid or long term memory. Pain, joy, pleasure, and fear are states that solidify memory traces. A heart attack, the infliction of wounds and bruises or humiliation, accidents, visits from a loved one-these are all examples of events that are easily remembered. However, a lasting record is almost impossible to attain if the subject is something that has been forced (like a student studying for higher marks) or if the subject does not appeal at all. Consolidation is necessary to make a short term memory a lasting one. However, if a student is curious about the subject and enjoys what he or she is learning, then long term memory is possible without too much effort in consolidation. Forced consolidation (e.g. a student’s orientation to attain higher marks) requires a longer period. The information is consolidated more easily when a person is in a sound and alert state of mind.

Storage in the long-term memory does not occur immediately after something has been learned or experienced. For this storage to be possible at least an hour needs to pass to synthesize the memory proteins that are responsible for recording. If electric shock is applied to a person’s brain immediately after an unforgettable event, they will not be able to remember the event. But if the electric shock is applied an hour later, the memory remains.

Once stored in long-term memory, information can be retrieved, even after months or years. When new information is obtained older information is called up and they are saved with a new pattern of storage, with the newcomers being related with the ones that have already been stored; it is in this way that long term memory is generated.

It has been argued that RNA has a role in storing old information. In experiments, guinea pigs were taught information through repeated practice which is stored in their long term memory. The brains of these animals were later minced up and fed to other animals. It was observed that those animals which had been fed the brains learned faster and more easily than other animals that had been fed on a diet that did not include the brains. This shows us that information encoded in the memory is not lost; rather it is transferred with the help of certain molecules. It is also known that DNA is related to genetic memory.

It has been found that people with good memories have a greater number of nerve cells and channels of transfer in the memory-related zones of their brains (cortex, corpus callosum, hippocampus, thalamus, hypothalamus, limbic system, amygdale, temporal lobe, and prefrontal cortex), while there are less cells in other zones of the brain. Nerve cells are stimulated while signals are stored in one’s memory. Even if a person has a weak memory, activities like reading, memorization, or other engagements that improve love, happiness, and peace of mind may help long-term memory.

Forgetfulness

It is important to find out whether forgetfulness occurs because of an illness or something else. Age is one major factor. Forgetfulness in an aging person is proportionate to the number of the loss of cells.

Stress, dealing with multiple things all at once, or occupying oneself with things that are of no benefit, that is, creating a pollution of information, all affect short term memory and may cause forgetfulness.

Forgetfulness due to damage or illness

If the nerve cells of the lower occipital lobe of the brain are damaged, old information cannot be retrieved. Likewise, in case of damage to the nerve cells that are found in the temporal lobes on the sides of the brain, or due to an insufficient intake of B3 and B12 vitamins, cerebral hemorrhage or an embolism in the veins of the memory zones forgetfulness may occur.

Patients with Alzheimer indicate short term memory loss. They tend to forget visitors’ names, daily events, or the doctor’s advice.

Chronic alcohol abuse may cause damage in the hippocampus and thus in the ability to encode information.

Electroshock may also delete recent information that has been recorded in the short-term memory. Thyroid failure, Parkinson’s, hydrocephaly, schizophrenia, brain tumors, and epilepsy may also cause forgetfulness.

Some advice

Spiritual teachings and religious services have many positive aspects in our lives in addition to being our duties for expressing our servanthood to God Almighty. In Islam, for instance, principles like “enjoining good and forbidding evil,” praying at night, a brief afternoon nap, staying away from what is forbidden, reading and/or memorizing the Qur’an, and other activities may provide some protection against forgetfulness.

It is also claimed that keeping oneself busy with things that are considered morally improper, not least things that are sexually provocative in an illegitimate way, may damage neurons that are operative in memory. In order to be less affected by forgetfulness in our advanced years, it can be helpful to read spiritually and intellectually useful material, to learn and memorize new words and concepts, to keep oneself in good moral condition by engaging in charity work and helping others, and to maintain good sleep and a healthy diet

On the other hand, thinking a bit more wisely, to be able to forget (not forgetfulness) also has many benefits. Our nervous system is relaxed by forgetting, otherwise it might collapse. Forgetting old informa¬tion could well open up room for new information, although this does not mean that the information is deleted from memory; it is retrieved when needed. But, if forgetting reaches a level that is above medically ex¬pected averages, then medical help should be sought.

There are incidents of patients who are suffering from dementia and Alzheimer regaining their memory after electroshock therapy. Perhaps this is evidence that we will remember and testify for all our actions when we will have to account for them.

“Welcome travelers! You may enter the king’s palace, and you may benefit from everything for free. When your time is due the king is going to take you to a better palace where you can stay forever. Respect the rules of the palace, and each other. Thank the king who provides everything to you, who built this palace just for you. The beauties of the palace are just samples, not the real bounties. Do not let them make you forget the owner of the palace, and the short time you have.” The King.

Then we entered the palace. There were servants, who welcomed us. We were all amazed by the palace, and its beauties. The servants took us to the bath. They cleaned us with rose-scented soaps, and jasmine oil. They brought us clean white cashmere clothes.

After we were all clean, the servants took us to a feast. They showed us our seats. The table was full of different kinds of food and fruits. We were starving; had not eaten for days. We started to eat. They were all delicious. After dinner, they took us to small houses. Inside the house every thing was made of silk, even the curtains. Outside, there were all kinds of trees, waterfalls, birds, fountains; even the sun was shining differently. I forgot that we were in the middle of a desert.

Days were passing very fast. Actually, it was a palace designed to serve us. When we were altogether, one of us stood up and said, “There cannot be a better place than this. I think this is the place where we should stay.” Most of us agreed with him, but I stood up, and said; “ But my friend, do not forget what we read on the gate, there is a king who owns the palace, and we all have a short time to stay here, and he offers us a better place if we act according to his will.” He replied, “I don’t think there is a king. Maybe there was, but he is not here any more. They wrote it when he was here, but he left the palace, so we are its owners.” Most of the people agreed with him, and said; “Yeah, we are the owners!” By this time, we were divided into basically three groups. One who claimed that they were the owners of the palace, and believed that they would stay forever in it. Second, the biggest group, who believed that there was a king, but they did not care about him. They were just so into the beauties of the palace, and they were drunk most of the time. Third, me, and some of my friends, the smallest of the groups, believed that there was a king, and we had a short time in the palace. Everything we had was a sample of the real bounties of the king in the better place where he was going to take us.

The first group, who claimed that they were the owners of the palace, started to treat the servants badly and violate all the rules. The second group also let them do whatever they wanted; they did not care about what was going on. The travelers in the caravan turned the palace into a hell.

With these thoughts on my mind I was looking at the books of old times. They were mostly history books, which were about the people who lived in this palace before us. I took a book, written three centuries ago; its name was Age of Rose. I turned the pages slowly; it was talking about an unbelievable period of time which lasted almost a thousand years in this same palace. There were people who lived a wonderful life in peace and joy. They were also righteous and thankful to the king. So, not all times have been like mine in this palace. Unfortunately, I came here in a wrong time, but as they say; there is for sure a reason for everything happening. The book was also mentioning about the outside of the palace, where people lived happily forever. Reading this chronicle I was comforted with an expectation promising an eternal glorious life.

I have not lost my hope for the future of this palace. I am striving hard with my friends to remind others of the King’s message, so that they become conscious about the purposes and wisdom behind their transient presence here. I am praying that the All-Merciful King will guide us to His Path and we all enter His Abode happily. 

Likewise, between yesterday and today there is a thin veil that cannot hinder the spirit from passing and penetrate into yesterday and the past beyond that. Whereas, with respect to the body, this distance is so great as to require a year to travel. Also, the veils between the outer and inner dimensions of existence and between the world and the Hereafter are thin and transparent for the men of heart and spirit, while they are extremely thick for those obeying their carnal selves and bodily desires.

Similarly, between your night and day there is a fine interval, which is your “eyelid”. When you open the eye of your self, your night disappears and your day shines. If, on the other hand, you forget what you are, you fall into a permanent night. Also, whoever looks at the universe for the sake of the Almighty, whatever he witnesses becomes a (source of) knowledge for him; if he looks with a view of heedlessness and from the perspective of material or natural causes, whatever he regards as knowledge becomes sheer ignorance.

Again, between the illumination of Aya Sofya (Hagia Sophia) and its being in thick darkness at night there is a time as short as switching off the lights. The flash of lightning and its disappearance take place almost at the same instant. The darkening of the sky with dark clouds and its clearing through the removal of dark clouds from the face of the sun by a breeze of mercy happen just one after the other in a short time. One who looks and sees with the light of faith and belief in Divine Unity, sees the universe filled with light and in friendship, mutual love and affection, and all things and beings in it as amiable, living brothers. Whereas one who looks with unbelief, sees all things and beings as dreadful corpses, strangers hostile to one another. He also sees the universe in veils of darkness one above the other and himself in a deep sea covered by waves riding upon waves, above which are clouds; when he puts forth his hand, he can hardly see it.

Also, the veil between the two faces of a mirror is thinner than a leaf but there is as great a difference between them as the distance between east and west. With a movement of a finger, the mirror either smiles at you or your face is completely dark. In the same way, the deeds of man have two aspects or “faces”. The deeds done with the intention to please God provide you with a transparent face in the depth of which numberless manifestations are reflected. The lack of such intention or the deeds not done for the sake of God show the dark, opaque face which bears nothing in the name of truth.

While the dark face has no depth and can contain nothing, with the exception of occupying space the size of itself, the transparent face, because of its relation to the immaterial world of ideas or symbols can, by virtue of its transparency, contain numberless huge things. In the same way, life has two faces, the first of which relates to the world and is dark, narrow and transient, while the other relating to the Truth is transparent, broad and permanent. The heedless carnal self, under the influence of a devilish sophistry, wears the dark face but demands what is possible in the transparent face like seeking eternity.

The key of creation is in the hands of man, in his ego. Although the doors of creation seem to be open, they are actually closed. The Truth, glory be to Him, has entrusted man with a key with which all the doors of creation are opened and the treasury of the Creator is unveiled. The key entrusted to you is ego, which is itself an enigma. When you solve that enigma by knowing its nature, creation is opened to you.

God Almighty, may His Glory be exalted, has given man ego so that it should serve as a unit of comparison to understand the attributes of Divine Lordship.

When man knows what ego is, he comes to see it as fine and weak like a conscious hair in the rope of man’s existence, like a thin stripe in the cloth of man’s nature, like an alif-the first Arabic letter-in the book of the individual. It has also two faces, one turned to good, a passive recipient of God’s bounties and blessings, not the agent, the other turned to evils and non-existence and being itself agent. It has an illusory nature, imagined lordship and sovereignty, and existence as weak as not to bear anything by itself. It is to function like a thermometer or other like instrument with which things and properties are measured. It is a measure with which to know the absolute, all-en-compassing Attributes of the Necessarily-Existent Being.

Man should be well aware of this and, becoming a referent of He has indeed prospered who purifies it. (Qur’an. 91.9) fulfil what is due to the Trust he has been charged with.

If you reflect on ego as a unit of comparison to comprehend the Creator’s Attributes and Names, it becomes an eye for you to see whatever exists in the universe. The information you get from the universe finds in ego what will confirm it and make it into real knowledge. Then its claim of lordship or sovereignty and self-ownership comes to an end, and it perceives that its existence is only an illusory one. Whereas if you consider ego as having an independent existence of itself and thereby breach the Trust, you will be among those referred to in And indeed he has ruined it who stunts and spoils it (91.10) For it is ego which the heavens, the earth and mountains shrank from bearing since, with that aspect of it, ego is the source of associating partners with God, all evils and kinds of misguidance. If ego hides itself from you, it grows thick and swells until it swallows you and, with all your existence, you become an ego. Then it grows stronger with tribal and then racial fanaticism until it has become a devil contending against the commandment of its Maker. Then it likens other people and things and natural causes with itself, attributing to each self-ownership and sovereignty, and thus falls into a tremendous kind of associating partners with God. While in this state, if you move your eyes throughout the creation, everything is closed in your face just when it seems to have opened to you, for your eyes return to your self and you see everything as colored by ego. The color of ego is associating partners with God or denial of Him. Even if all the horizons were clearly filled with the most manifest signs (of the existence and Unity of the Creator), what remains in ego would be a dark point covering all those signs.

An Important matter

Ego has two faces, one represented by Prophethood, the other by human, (materialistic) philosophy.

The first face is the origin of pure servanthood to God. With this face, ego points to God, not itself, and has an illusory, dependent existence. Although it appears to be self-owning, in fact it is owned and disposed by another-God. It has a supposed, not an established, reality. Its duty is to be a measure, a unit of comparison, to understand the Attributes of the Creator. This is the reality of ego, as it was seen by the Prophets, who submitted the whole of existence to God. They affirmed and demonstrated that God has no partners at all, either in His Sovereignty or in His Lordship or Divinity. In His hand are the keys of all things and He has absolute power over all things. From this transparent face of ego, the All-Compassionate has grown a blessed tree of servanthood whose blessed branches spreading through the garden of the universe hang with clusters of fruits of Messengers, Prophets, saints, and truth-seeking, pure scholars glittering in darkness like stars.

As to philosophy, it considers ego as having an independent, self-owned existence showing to itself. Philosophers have supposed that ego has an established reality and that its duty is to be perfected through self-love. In this supposition many kinds of associating partners with God have originated and on the head of ego has grown the accursed tree of misguidance. The branch of the power of lust of this tree, which appreciates unjust might or force and physical beauty enamoured of show, has given to mankind idols deified (by their admirers) while themselves bow (before their admirers) in an attitude of adoration. The branch of the power of wrath has saddled mankind with Pharaohs and Nimrods. The branch of the power of reason has produced atheists and materialists. Philosophers attribute to God only a part of His kingdom and attribute the rest to other than the Almighty.

Although ego is essentially like air or vapor, because of the philosophers’ illomened view, it grows denser, becoming like fluid and then, because of superficial familiarity, like a solid thing. Afterwards, because of heedlessness it gets frozen and, thereafter, because of rebellion, gets stronger and swells until it swallows its owner. It becomes broader with tribal or racial attitudes and then, because of ascribing to other people and natural causes self-existence and ownership and even creativity, as it ascribes the same to itself, ego starts to contend against the commandment of its Creator. Some philosophers have felt compelled to believe that natural causes have real effect in creation and control of things, and attribute creativity to nature and chance. That is why they deny the Resurrection and accept that spirits or, as is the case with materialists, matter have no beginning. May God assail them! How perverse they are! Because of conceit, they have become playthings of devils, who have thrown them into the pits of misguidance.

Ego in the normocosmos-man-is the counterpart of nature in the macro-cosmos: both have been attributed partnership with God and therefore deified. Whoever denies false deities and believes in God, has laid hold of the most firm handle that is impossible to break. God is All-Hearing, All-Knowing. (2.256)

The law of growth operates in a tree. The seed of a tree, from which it grows, is the essence of that tree. As is known, the seed is contained by the fruit and, unless somehow impeded, it grows by eternal Favouring into the tree and again is placed in the fruit growing on that tree. The fruit is the most valuable, most esteemed, most pleasant, most important and most illustrious part of the tree, being the aim of its existence. The universe is a tree, the basic elements like earth, water, air and fire being its branches, plants its leaves, animals its flowers and mankind its fruits.

The most radiant of those fruits and the most illustrious, greatest, most beautiful, most noble, most comprehensive and most beneficial of them is the Prophet Muhammad, upon him be peace and blessings, the master of the Messengers, the leader of the pious, and the beloved of the Lord of the Worlds. He is the commander of the “cavalry” of the Prophets and the pious ones faithful to their allegiance and promises, and the most virtuous of all creatures. He is the bearer of the standard of the greatest glory through belief in and submission to Divine Unity and the owner of the most esteemed and dignified rope through Islam. He is the witness of eternal mysteries and observer of the lights and the translator of the tongues of those preceding him. He is the source of knowledge, forbearance and wisdom. He attained the highest rank of servanthood and was distinguished with the highest morality of the purest ranks: the greatest friend of God and His most noble beloved, upon him be the most meritorious of blessings and peace so long as the heavens and earth remain.

Take my hand. O master of the Messengers,
You are the desired and sought, O man fest light of God’s Munificence;
I have no leader, no refuge, other than you.
My proof is, ‘There is no god but God and Muhammad is God’s Messenger.” 

Those who have been detained half-way have been hindered by conjectures.

Who truly seeks will truly find Him, while the indolent can do neither.

For His slaves on their spiritual journey, He is the final destination.

The souls who do not recognize Him as Friend, who do not die to themselves to be raised again in Him,

The souls who did not live nor will die for His sake are utterly bereft and destitute.

Come, friends, let’s set out to reach the realm of the Beloved;

And let us see the rose of His beauty for a moment in light.

The world is pitiless and cruel, all around is fog and cloud;

It is but a loss and waste of time to stay here even for a short while.

We are travellers, and our home coming is with Him alone

What an honour to reach Him; and

Faith is the only means of arriving, this aim by His leave and grace.