Tears and touching are some of the most profound forms of connection among people. They soften hearts and open doors to each other’s hearts that were otherwise closed. Spiritual care in a hospital environment brings people together in the best way possible under the worst of conditions. I regularly meet strangers and confront situations that require patience and acceptance so I can do the best for others.

What does a multi-faith hospital chaplain do? First and foremost, a chaplain is always there to be a listening ear in a compassionate and caring manner. A hospital chaplain cares about spiritual and emotional well-being of patients, their families or loved ones, as well as the staff at the hospital. As chaplains, we are in the service of everyone, religious or non-religious, faithful, agnostic, or atheist, during both good times and bad times to share joy and sorrow. We visit the patients that need comfort and support, and listens to their worries, concerns or happiness. We are with the patient in their last moments to offer blessings and stay with the families when their loved ones are going through this transition. We are together the broken-hearted who need to be heard, patients who request prayers before their surgeries, and babies who are newly born or die young. We touch hearts, wipe tears, listen to life stories, open spiritual gates, and help people reflect on their own lives to find out where they are on their journey. Lastly, we encourage and empower the ones who are in their recoveries. Sometimes patients are the teachers who allow chaplains journey with them.

I had an interesting encounter with a 67-year-old Catholic lady who came to the hospital for spinal surgery. She did not ask for a chaplain visit but her name was on my unit list. I met her post-procedure during my regular rounds. She was frustrated and upset because the doctors told her that she had cancer; however, what type of cancer she had was still unknown ten days into her stay. She was emotionally overwhelmed with worry about her physical condition because the doctors were still testing the results, and she felt they were not giving her clear answers. She was not alone, because her daughters lived close to her however she could not help but cry when she started to speak about being away from her home and family for a long time, along with the uncertainty she faced which was obviously hindering her ability to cope. I was very concerned with her psychological and emotional state. She was not ready for a longer conversation with me. She dismissed me after a few more minutes and said, “I rather want to be alone at this moment”. I replied, “I understand, it is okay with me.” Upon leaving, I reflected on not being able to help her at all. I felt badly of the situation, and felt that I had missed an opportunity to provide care that I was not able to reach through to her.

The next day, the patient’s nurse telephoned the Spiritual Care Office and requested that I return. The phone call meant a lot for me because I anticipated that there was something significant happening. I immediately went to the patient’s floor and saw her nurse. She told me that the patient wanted to see me before she was transferred to another unit. Upon entering the room, the lady told me that she did not want me to know her as a rude person. She apologized for her attitude the other day and said, “We are both believers and we should not be like that towards each other.” I confirmed this sentiment, and she continued, “I don’t know as much about your faith as I should know, and I felt that I need to know more of it.” She asked me if I could talk about the main principles of Islam, and I accepted her request. I stayed with her explaining, shortly, the basics of Islam, how God sent prophets to all human beings throughout history, and how the Qur’an was revealed and compiled. We had a good discussion which relaxed her and as our conversation ended our relationship between each other was more important than her illness. Her embarrassment replaced with peace at the end. “I am so glad that I was able to call you back,” she said with contentment. “I am so glad that you took the opportunity to invite me again to your room” I responded with a smile. This time, I left her room with a great sense of relief and satisfaction.

“Can you hold my hand?”

Another thought-provoking visit was with a 69-year-old lady who came to the Emergency Department (ED) on a night when I was on overnight duty. It was 4:40 am when I was paged by the ED nurse as the patient asked for a Catholic priest, who was not available. She indicated that the multi-faith chaplain was okay to visit with her. She looked youthful and pretty in her bed but, as I asked her about her concern, she responded, “I am scared of dying.” Doctors had told her that she had an obstruction which was resulting in a removal of one of her kidneys. She was also experiencing blood pressure and diabetic issues.

She was alone at the hospital and her emotions were in a whirl with many thoughts on her mind as the surgery was imminent. We continued the conversation in a manner to address the frustration and fear she was feeling. She responded positively to my empathy and reassurance. She told me about her financial difficulties and that she would lose her home soon. Then she asked me, “Can you do me a favor?” I said, “Sure, what is it?” She asked, “Can you hold my hand?” I took her hand gently and prayed to God, asking Him to provide her with comfort, peace, relief from her worries and for a successful surgery. It was a moment that we both appreciated. After prayer, she asked me about myself and we spoke of our families. I reminded her that the Spiritual Care would be happy to be with her and that I would like to follow up with her during her stay. She seemed relieved and less anxious by the time I departed. I can only imagine how stressful it was for a lonely lady who was dealing with many issues in a strange place in the middle of the night.

From a personal point of view, conversations on faith or religion always remain behind the feelings or emotions of the patients during my visits. I focus on their current spiritual or emotional crisis within the hospital. My goal in my interactions with patients is to provide a safe and non-judgmental space built upon trust and a genuine human connection. After assessing their needs, sometimes I explore if they have a religious background or community, any spiritual practices such as reading holy texts, prayers, rituals, or meditations which might be helpful support for them. I also try to understand if any of their practices help them cope with their difficulties in any way. On the other hand, each patient is unique and each visit is different than the last. One common point is that when words cease to be enough, a warm touch on the hand or the shoulder, or a silent tear shed, become powerful enough to build the connection between the chaplain and the patient. The goal is to always share a genuine moment between two strangers, one of which may literally be on their death bed. It helps to remind us that our faith and appreciation of the Divine can unite us, and that we will all return to God someday.

“Welcome travelers! You may enter the king’s palace, and you may benefit from everything for free. When your time is due the king is going to take you to a better palace where you can stay forever. Respect the rules of the palace, and each other. Thank the king who provides everything to you, who built this palace just for you. The beauties of the palace are just samples, not the real bounties. Do not let them make you forget the owner of the palace, and the short time you have.” The King.

Then we entered the palace. There were servants, who welcomed us. We were all amazed by the palace, and its beauties. The servants took us to the bath. They cleaned us with rose-scented soaps, and jasmine oil. They brought us clean white cashmere clothes.

After we were all clean, the servants took us to a feast. They showed us our seats. The table was full of different kinds of food and fruits. We were starving; had not eaten for days. We started to eat. They were all delicious. After dinner, they took us to small houses. Inside the house every thing was made of silk, even the curtains. Outside, there were all kinds of trees, waterfalls, birds, fountains; even the sun was shining differently. I forgot that we were in the middle of a desert.

Days were passing very fast. Actually, it was a palace designed to serve us. When we were altogether, one of us stood up and said, “There cannot be a better place than this. I think this is the place where we should stay.” Most of us agreed with him, but I stood up, and said; “ But my friend, do not forget what we read on the gate, there is a king who owns the palace, and we all have a short time to stay here, and he offers us a better place if we act according to his will.” He replied, “I don’t think there is a king. Maybe there was, but he is not here any more. They wrote it when he was here, but he left the palace, so we are its owners.” Most of the people agreed with him, and said; “Yeah, we are the owners!” By this time, we were divided into basically three groups. One who claimed that they were the owners of the palace, and believed that they would stay forever in it. Second, the biggest group, who believed that there was a king, but they did not care about him. They were just so into the beauties of the palace, and they were drunk most of the time. Third, me, and some of my friends, the smallest of the groups, believed that there was a king, and we had a short time in the palace. Everything we had was a sample of the real bounties of the king in the better place where he was going to take us.

The first group, who claimed that they were the owners of the palace, started to treat the servants badly and violate all the rules. The second group also let them do whatever they wanted; they did not care about what was going on. The travelers in the caravan turned the palace into a hell.

With these thoughts on my mind I was looking at the books of old times. They were mostly history books, which were about the people who lived in this palace before us. I took a book, written three centuries ago; its name was Age of Rose. I turned the pages slowly; it was talking about an unbelievable period of time which lasted almost a thousand years in this same palace. There were people who lived a wonderful life in peace and joy. They were also righteous and thankful to the king. So, not all times have been like mine in this palace. Unfortunately, I came here in a wrong time, but as they say; there is for sure a reason for everything happening. The book was also mentioning about the outside of the palace, where people lived happily forever. Reading this chronicle I was comforted with an expectation promising an eternal glorious life.

I have not lost my hope for the future of this palace. I am striving hard with my friends to remind others of the King’s message, so that they become conscious about the purposes and wisdom behind their transient presence here. I am praying that the All-Merciful King will guide us to His Path and we all enter His Abode happily. 

The Plaza of Abraham is a place that will host and welcome people of all faiths, especially followers of the Abrahamic faiths. The Plaza is envisioned as being built on approximately ten acres of land. On this land a large circle, called Abraham’s Circle, has been planned. Three places of worship are positioned on the circle. If the circle were a clock, at 3 o’clock there is a mosque, at 7 o’clock a synagogue, and at 11 o’clock a church is located. These will be active places of worship. People will feel safe and comfortable in these places. To illustrate this feeling of safety and comfort for our readers, we would like to them to imagine that they are going to stay in a foreign city, where they do not know the language. They may well prefer to stay in a hotel which is part of a well-known chain. A significant number of people visiting foreign cities would prefer to stay in a well-known hotel, because even though they have come to this foreign city to explore and discover new, fascinating facts of history and geography, even though they are there to visit places, meet people and otherwise live an experience that is novel and different from what their experience at home, they would still prefer to stay in a place that is familiar to them, as a starting point. In the same way do the places of worship on the Circle of Abraham serve as safe and comfortable starting points for people who want to discover other religions. They give the message: Come, you are safe here.

The imams, the rabbis and the priests to be employed in these places of worship are not simply religious leaders; they are scholars as well. They can and are willing to study different religions without any prejudice. They are also guides for other people in the dialogue experience, they serve to protect this effort from falling into a common dilemma: the blind leading the blind. In interfaith dialogue, in efforts where knowledgeable people are not involved, ignorant members of the groups can easily turn the atmosphere into a critical one. In order to prevent such occurrences, these scholarly religious leaders have authority over the people of their faith and there is an internalized approach to dialogue, based on such principles of interfaith dialogue as courtesy, respect, self-critical examination, abandonment of preconceptions and seeking first to understand before trying to be understood.

The plaza will also have a computerized digital library that provides access to digital copies of the main sources for all three religions. Scholars of the different religions will come together to discuss recent issues, and past and possible future interpretations of the religious sources. These efforts focus on searching for interpretations of the sources that foster peace, harmony and mutual coexistence instead of animosity.

A common value to each of these three faiths is hospitality. To bring this common value to the fore, Abraham’s plaza has a feast table covered by a large tent. Once a year a celebration will be held that will last for many days and weeks. Through this event, the People of the Book (as described in the Qur’an) become the People of the Tent. A feast like this is also likely to attract young people. The feast itself and the possibility of making friends from other faiths and nations is likely to be attractive to them.

We envision replicas of Abraham’s Plaza being constructed on all continents of the earth: Europe, Asia, the Americas, Australia and Africa. We envision plazas in major cities, as well as in any small towns where there is a representation of all these faiths. We live in a strange age. We have the best, most widespread and fastest means of communication and transportation to date. Yet the world still faces challenges of misunderstanding and animosity. Projects like the Abraham’s Plaza are needed to get everyday people involved in an interfaith dialogue and in the active pursuit of a more peaceful world.

Reference

• Feiler, Bruce. Abraham, a Journey into the Hearts of Three Faiths. Harper Collins Publishers, 2002.

Despite the improvements, increased age, in general, coincides with an increased incidence of both mental and physical illness. This is made worse by a weakening of social contacts and a reduction of income. Thus increasing age is also characterized by a dramatic increase in the use of health and social services. The older the person, the more likely he or she is to be admitted to hospital and the longer the stay.

The increasing demands on the hospital service have not been met by an increase in the total number of hospital beds. Medical and surgical treatments previously thought to require a three- or four-week stay in hospital are treated within a week or ten days. Also more work is now undertaken in the outpatient department on a day-care basis without overnight stay. Many medical cases previously requiring hospital care are now dealt with by the family doctor with the patient at home.

The whole concept of care has changed dramatically in recent years, and this has affected the caring approach in hospitals, residential homes and in the community. In the past, caring involved an active carer looking after a passive patient. Although it seemed quite natural to look after the sick and disabled in this way, the process produced too much dependence of the patient or client on the carer. The modern approach in health and social services is a process of enabling. Carers enable patients (or clients) to do as much as they can for themselves. This approach reduces dependence and keeps down the total level of care required.

The idea is that illness is best treated at home, if possible. The new legislation on community care, which took effect on the 1st April 1993, is based on this principle. Pain is a burden on oneself, and being removed from home and family to the strange environment of a hospital ward adds to the stress. This is especially so for the very young and the very old.

However, not all homes are the most satisfactory places in which to be ill. Many lack the basic amenities of hot and cold water, indoor lavatory, and satisfactory heating. Also there may be no relative or friend to do the caring,-to prepare food, ensure and maintain good standards of hygiene, and to offer companionship. Often the problems can be overcome to a certain extent by the use of voluntary help from religious groups and the agencies of the Health Service and local authority (e.g. community nurses, home helps, and ‘meals on wheels’).

At present only about 6% of all elderly people are in institutional care of some sort (hospitals, residential homes, and private nursing homes). Even this small percentage imposes very heavy burdens on these institutions; present resources are simply not enough to meet even a small increase in numbers. There are waiting lists for most institutions caring for the elderly.

A further 12% of the elderly are enabled to manage in their own homes, with the help of the care agencies already mentioned. The new community care programme strongly encourages such help in the home. Only a reduction in the proportion of very old people in the total population and a healthier elderly population would result in some easing of the problem.

Care on a self help / family / neighbourhood basis backed up by the provisions of the health and social services appears to deliver good results. When husbands, wives, brothers, sisters, friends and neighbours, are involved together in the process of caring for the elderly, a very good sense of community develops. Children in particular have a special responsibility towards their parents. God says in the Qur’an:

Your lord has decreed that you worship none but Him, and that you be kind to parents, whether one or both of them attain old age in your life, say not to them a word of contempt, nor repel them, but address them in terms of honour. And, out of kindness, lower to them the wing of humility and say: ‘My lord! bestow on them Your mercy even as they cherished me in childhood.’ (al-Isra,17.23-4)

26% of elderly people have no children at all and so are especially vulnerable in times of crisis. In other cases the children may exist but are so far away as to be unable to help. Regular help to the elderly is best given by relatives, neighbours, and friends-shopping, housework, house maintenance, gardening and social visits. However, statutory and voluntary services are still required to take over-or at least plug the gaps-if the task proves to be too great for the community. It is, of course, best for society if people learn to care for one another in their own homes. 

Those who have been detained half-way have been hindered by conjectures.

Who truly seeks will truly find Him, while the indolent can do neither.

For His slaves on their spiritual journey, He is the final destination.

The souls who do not recognize Him as Friend, who do not die to themselves to be raised again in Him,

The souls who did not live nor will die for His sake are utterly bereft and destitute.

Come, friends, let’s set out to reach the realm of the Beloved;

And let us see the rose of His beauty for a moment in light.

The world is pitiless and cruel, all around is fog and cloud;

It is but a loss and waste of time to stay here even for a short while.

We are travellers, and our home coming is with Him alone

What an honour to reach Him; and

Faith is the only means of arriving, this aim by His leave and grace.