As I sit and wait for my day of judgment,
I ponder the future.

Can I continue to live my life as I dream and desire?
Or will I remain doomed to a lifetime of cries
and days of gloom?

People say that I am arrogant and full of myself.
I say that if you really know me and my life,
you would understand the struggle that lies within my heart.

Living as I do, I have to be this way.
Not able to shed tears, for fear
that my moment of weakness will appear.
Trying to remain hard,
not to show my cards
so that I can have another day of happiness with my kids.

Learning how to be a mother and a woman above all,
and yearning for the life of a family: I so desperately need that.

But I have to put my past life behind me
and never look back.

I can’t live the past and feel peace within my heart,
because if the streets don’t wear me down,
the nightmares will tear me apart.

They say crying heals the soul.
I wonder how true that is.
I cry every night in hopes that I get my soul back.

This is a two-way street, so speak—
but I am sorry to say,
it can only go one way.

Now I am going to ask you a “Fill in the Blank” question. There are political, economic, cultural, oppressive, feminist-based, family guidance-based, place of birth-based, religious, sociological reasons why woman… (Fill in the blank with: Cover or not cover their hair)

To understand the issue of head covering it is important to realize not all women choose to cover or not cover based on the same reasons. For example a woman may cover simply because she was born in a village in Sivas, Turkey, and this may come naturally. She will see it as something people in her family have been doing for hundreds of years, and might not even give a second thought to the practice. A woman born in Utah, USA may not cover because she has never seen anyone doing it in her family and might not even think about it. Both of these women are not consciously given decisions. They are just the way they are.

Another example may be that a woman in Pakistan, going to a more religious school, may cover not to stand out because she is afraid of peer pressure. And a woman in England going to a liberal school may be afraid of covering because she will stand out and be subjected to a different form of peer pressure.

In different sects of Christianity, Judaism, or Sikhism women may choose to cover their hair. Similarly, they may choose to shave their head if they are practicing Buddhism. Some Muslim women may cover, and others may not. So as you see, the argument about to cover or not to cover is really endless, and as far as I am concerned, is a time consuming debate which could go both ways depending on who is arguing it, and why they are arguing it. Arguments will usually take people nowhere because people going into the argument already have a predetermined opinion. During an argument, the only thing they are focusing on is defeating their opponent. So they are constantly thinking of coming up with new ways to prove why “they are right”, and even if they have not been able to convince their opponent by the end of the argument, they have convinced themselves even further by finding 100 more reasons on why “they are right.” So no, I am not here to offer you my argument on the topic. But instead I am here to share. I will share why I choose to cover and what I feel when I cover, realizing this is utterly personal. I am not speaking on behalf of all Muslim women, nor am I speaking on behalf of what is the right thing to do. I am speaking on behalf of my experience with the Muslim veil; so I can grow, and perhaps you can grow, and by the end perhaps we might be a little more inspired compared to our starting point before this article.

I come from an international family, so I was not raised Muslim. I embraced Islam at the age of 22, only a couple of years ago. My encounter with Islam didn’t come from my family or friends, but it was rather personal. I see it as something that was meant to be and so it happened.

In the days when I used to do makeup and my hair, I would say I could bring some attention to myself; yet no matter how much I dressed up, there was always a woman more beautiful than me in my immediate surroundings. Before submitting to Islam, I did try to compete and shine and draw attention, and I really think that was necessary for me to understand the meaning behind veiling.

It happened very suddenly. I was a student, doing my bachelor’s in the USA. I didn’t really think about it, nor did I really weigh the consequences. One night, I was turning in my bed, from left to right, right to left, unable to sleep and the next day I went out of the house with a black scarf on my head combined with a Victoria’s Secret hoodie and loose jeans, to meet my friend. I texted my friend before meeting her; my text said: “Hey, so I don’t want to shock you, but I am coming to meet you with a Muslim head scarf.” So that is how my story started. But I am not writing to tell you my story; I want to write about the state of worship I feel after I covered.

There is no doubt that female beauty was created by God in such a manner that it almost screams out the beauty of the Divine. And yet, just as many ideologies such as Feminism have pointed out, female beauty and sexuality has been turned into a matter of pure arrogance between woman, dictated by an industry run by men, whose only desire is to make money out of it. To use it and abuse it. Unfortunately, something so Divine, has been turned into something so shallow. They have used it to sell their products and they have used it to control power. And I had bought their story: this is how I know the amount of damage it can cause to a woman. Because it also damaged me. A lot.

I was created fairly beautiful, but instead of being thankful for it, I always competed with it. Sexuality and beauty had turned into things I would compete for, things that I would look at jealously in other women, and realize other women envied in me. It was a cruel competition, when women’s magazines constantly bombarded me beauty products, fashion, surgical and non surgical ways to beautify myself so that I could hold my man’s eyes upon myself. Things I needed to do so he wouldn’t cheat on me. Then I would turn the page, simply turn one thin layer of paper to come across an article about self confidence and the keys to feel beautiful and sexy the way you are. Between two millimeters of thickness lay two incredibly huge concepts that women have been enslaved to. We’ve produced this race that nobody will ever win; and that is the exact point of producing it in the first place. Feeding our ego that makes us feel so good when we declare our beauty to the world, and betrays us when something better comes along.

My aim with my veil is to internalize the philosophy of Rumi, who said, “Die before you die.” I tell myself: “It’s ok, there is no race, step aside. Be humble. Keep your beauty within. Liberate yourself from things that don’t matter. Be afraid that one of your sisters may feel pain in her heart because she feels less because of your beauty. Understand that the most precious creation in this Universe is a human heart. Be sensitive toward the women who have lost their families because of the cruel sexuality games. Be sensitive to those who are going through the pain of anorexia. Care for the ones who are depressed because of their weight. Care for the women who have been used and abused by rich business man only to be thrown away like a piece of garbage and who are feeling lost and empty inside. Don’t judge the women who don’t cover. Don’t judge women who have sexual relationships in return for money. Don’t judge anorexic women trying to models. But instead, care for them. Be sensitive to their feelings, to their inner battles. Step aside from the silent completion that is going on between them, hide your sexuality and let women who are in the competition feel safe in your presence. Be their shelter. Allow her to look at you and know that you are out of the game. Try to give her a moment of peace while she is with you because only God knows the struggles she is going through. Suppress your ego. Know that your value does not depend on how you look but depends on your spirituality. Take every part of ego in your heart and crush it. Crush your desire to be superior to other human beings, in every single aspect. Internalize it in every possible aspect of your life, including spirituality, physical beauty, success, fame or money. Love them, care for them, nourish them. So before going out from your house, first wear your veil over your heart that will protect it from the evil in the world, then complete it with your physical veil. Be at peace. Smile like the Virgin Mary…”

And quite surprisingly, when I was in the Western world, the moment I tried smiling like Mary, I would encounter people acting like Jesus. I am in no means saying veiling is the only way to accomplish this, but I am saying that veiling, together with other practices, has led me to this path and I am very thankful for it. Veiling has become a means of healing for my heart. And for the first time in my life, I felt satisfied with how I looked, which led to self confidence and internal peace. No matter what I say, I can’t express myself better than Rumi did, so I will finish with a quote from him:

“With God two ‘I’s cannot form. You say ‘I’ and he says ‘I’. Either you die before him, or let him die before you, then duality would not remain. But it is impossible for him to die, either subjectively or objectively, since he is the ever living God, the undying. He possesses such gentleness, that if it was possible, He would die before you so that duality may vanish. But since it is impossible for him to die, you die, so He may manifest himself to you and duality may vanish.”

Honor killings are not a new type of murder or unique to any particular time or place. They are not associated with Islam, and there is no difference in their base causes or those of Femicide and crimes of passion. Several religious and cultural traditions have held the view that women are second class citizens compared to men; that their place in society is to benefit men; or that they are possessions to be dealt with in a manner befitting a man’s choice. In Ancient Rome, “honor played an important part in the structure of Roman society… justifications for honor killings can be found in the family law of the Roman Empire” (Shah-David, 2011 p. 191). The legal differentiations between honor killings and other forms of homicide are based in Roman law. The father, or pater familias (head of the family), had jus vitae ac necis (power of life and death), thus no punishment could be imposed on a father or husband for killing their female family members (Bettiga-Bourerbout, 2005). It is also said that Judeo-Christian religious tradition claims men and women were punished because of Eve’s decision to eat the forbidden fruit; women were punished further by being made subservient to men, and made to suffer through the pain of child birth and menstruation (Azeem, n.d.). Yet as Shah-David claims, killing in the name of honor is also found in other societies, such as Hindu communities and in Sardinia and Sicily. Despite these incidences, “this does not mean that Roman Catholicism encourages it” (2011 p. 191). In Australia, in a case of a Western Caucasian couple, a man strangled his wife, and community members claimed, “It is an honor killing…to avenge his male pride, to reassert his status in the world. He saw himself as the patriarch of the family and refused to accept her right to leave.” (The Age, 2006). The question must be asked why Islam remains as justification for femicide and why its occurrence is amplified when committed in Muslim societies.

Islam calls people to unburden themselves from the restraints and false claims of the material life and to return to God and the true way of life. As such, a society with material values will stand against such an ideal (Abushouk, 2006). Honor killings are a cultural practice, just as the Western media magnifying their occurrence is also cultural. It is statistically recorded that crime incidents against women in some Western countries are drastically higher when compared to Muslim and some non-Western countries. (Nation Master, 2011). These statistics support that Islam is not behind the underlying attitudes of violence towards women.

Honor killing is the murder of a person who has supposedly brought dishonor to a family and where a public display condemning that person is required to restore family respect. This supposed shame is most commonly attributed to a family member who commits – or is accused, or suspected of committing – an indecent sexual act. Even rape is sometimes considered to “blacken” a woman’s chastity, and thus tarnishing her family’s honor. There is a belief that blood will remove the stain upon the family. This means the death of the woman – and sometimes, though less often, the death of the man, too. These deaths are very often public.

Honor killings may also occur when a woman will not enter into a forced marriage, seeks to obtain a divorce, or acts in any way which may be considered sexually promiscuous and a male family member feels dishonored by such displays (Merry, 2009). Being “too Western” is also a reason given to justify this type of crime (Chesler, 2010).

However, Islam gives very clear instructions about behaviors regarding women, adultery, divorce and legal testimony; these instructions go against any justification for honor killings. Women are considered the spiritual equal of men, their responsibilities towards God the same. There are differences between a man and woman regarding their respective worldly duties, but there is plenty of evidence in the Qur’an and in the practice of the Prophet that women should be treated fairly and gently. They are to be treated with a deep respect, going so far as to lay heaven under a mother’s feet (Hadith, Ahmad Nasai), and are entitled to receive honor and the best form of care: “The best among you is the one who is the best towards his wife” (Muslim).

Therefore, the relationship between men and women is to achieve mutual benefit and pleasure, and to help each other achieve their purpose in life. With regard to adultery, both men and women are equally responsible. Even though couples are encouraged to stay together, divorce is still halal (permissible) in Islam if a man and woman feel they cannot be equitable to each other and if they have exhausted all possible solutions. As such, claiming that wanting a divorce is grounds for dishonor and murder cannot in any way be ascribed to Islam. The Qur’an also states that four reliable witnesses be brought to testify against a women they claim is impious (An-Nisa 4:15). This is far from a support for honor killings on grounds of suspicion. A lack of Islam and cultural reasons can be the only other basis for this rationalization. And many people – both Muslim and non-Muslim – have expressed concern over “Western values” spreading through the Islamic world (Abou El Fadl, 2005). Sexual promiscuity may be seen as encouraged by Western media and Hollywood. Yet the concerns people express over this is by no means an excuse or justification for murder, but rather an example of why Islamic values must be holistically implemented, especially in Muslim’s lives.

Any justification for killing in the name of honor goes against true honor from God. Culturally developed and encouraged desires have an influence over people and their self-control, allowing a justification and belief to develop that they have a right and responsibility to commit heinous acts. No example in Islam can support honor killing. Therefore, we see that it is a cultural practice caused by the incorrect or incomplete application of Islam in Muslim societies. There are many examples, as given above, which prove that honor killing or other forms of femicide are among many very serious human problems. It is a grave form of human violence, and a true and comprehensive interpretation of Islamic values proves that Muslims can, and must, positively contribute to solving this problem, not the other way around. If some disgraceful practices are being attributed to Islam, it is not because they are part of Islam but because some Muslim communities are simultaneously practicing and propagating a blend of Islamic, contemporary, and Jahiliyyah (pre-Islamic ignorance) teachings. Islam is a holistic religion; a person’s life, death, actions, beliefs, feelings, obligations, and their very nature is addressed in the Qur’an and the Prophet’s practice. Through the revealed scriptures and the examples of the Prophets, God has taught humanity about our vices and virtues, but also how to overcome and strengthen them so we can achieve balance and happiness. A proper understanding of how to achieve this balance entails a thorough, rather than partial, reading of the wonderful sources at our disposal.

Kim Soltani is a student of Islamic Studies at the Centre for Islamic Studies and Civilisation, Charles Sturt University, Sydney, Australia.

References

• Abou El Fadl, K. 2005. The nature and role of women. In The Great Theft. New York: Harper SanFransisco.
• Abushouk, A. I. 2006. Globalization and Muslim identity challenges and prospects. The Muslim World. 96(4), 487-505. Malaysia: Kuala Lumpur.
• Azeem, S. (n.d.) Women in Islam versus Women in the Judaeo-Christian Tradition: The Myth & The Reality. Canada: Queens University.
• Bettiga-Bourerbout, M., 2005. “Crimes of Honor” in the Italian Penal Code: an analysis of history and reform. In Honor: crimes, paradigms and violence against women. (eds S. Hossain, & L. Welchman,) Victoria: Spinifex Press.
• Chesler, P., 2010 Worldwide Trends in Honor Killings. In The Middle East Quarterly. Retrieved from http://www.meforum.org/2646/worldwide-trends-in-honor-killings
• Hadith. (n.d.). Ahmad Nasai, Retrieved from http://www.soundvision.com/Info/mothers/inquran&hadith.asp
• Kaandhlawi, Z., 2004. Faza’il-e-a’maal (A. R. Arshad, Trans.). India:Millat Book Centre.
• Merry, S., 2009. Gender violence: a cultural perspective. United Kingdom: Blackwell Publishing.
• Murad, A., (n.d.).Boys will be Boys. Retrieved from http://www.masud.co.uk/ISLAM/ahm/boys.htm
• Nation Master. 2011. Crime Statistics Rape (per capita) (most recent) by country. Retrieved from http://www.nationmaster.com/graph/cri_rap_percap-crime-rapes-per-capita
• Quran. (n.d.). Trans. Sahih International. Retrieved from http://www.quran.com
• Shah-Davis, S. 2011. A women’s honor and a nation’s shame. In Gender, Sexualities and Law (ed J Jones, A Grear, R Fenton, K Stevenson). New York: Routledge.
• The Age. 2006. Honor killing in the suburbs. Retrieved from http://www.theage.com.au/news/National/Honor-killing-in-the-suburbs/2004/11/05/1099547388469.html%E2%80%9D
• United Nations Department of Public Information. 1996. Women and Violence. Retrieved from http://www.un.org/rights/dpi1772e.htm

Harming our bodies or health is a betrayal against this incredible gift. One of the major ways people harm the body is through smoking cigarettes.

Smoking harms human health in countless ways. It is one of the main causes of many diseases, such as lung and throat cancer, along with cardiovascular and respiratory track diseases, such as chronic bronchitis. According to the latest report from the World Health Organization, smoking remains the fourth of the top ten risks that threaten human health. Approximately 20-30% of adult fatalities are caused by ailments contributed to by smoking. Recent studies have shown the negative effects smoking has on human reproductive functions.

Effects on fallopian tubes

Smoking has a negative impact on female reproductive organs; this impact is determined by how long, and how much, a woman smokes. It may cause infertility by damaging the fallopian tubes that serve as a ground for the egg to be fertilized by sperm. In many studies, the risk of damage to the fallopian tubes was very high – this danger increases if a woman starts smoking a pack a day before the age of 18.

Effects on female hormones

Many toxic substances in cigarette smoke, including nicotine, directly inhibits the activity of the enzyme called aromatase, which plays a major role in the synthesis of the female hormone (estrogen) in the ovaries. Depending on the biological function, estrogen can be found in three different forms: as estrone, estriol and estradiol. Polyaromatic hydrocarbons found in cigarette smoke stimulate the microsomal cytochrome P-450 enzyme system that degrades hormones in the liver and, consequentially, increases conversion of estradiol with high biologic activity into estriol with the lowest activity. Alkaloids, one of the harmful substances found in cigarette smoke, were discovered to prevent production of progesterone in the ovaries. This plays a role in preparing the womb and in continuation of the pregnancy during the first three months. Therefore, smoking leads to progesterone deficiency during the early stages of pregnancy, causing miscarriages.

Effects on the maturation of the egg

The concentrations of the FSH hormone that is involved in the maturation of reproductive cells in the ovaries are especially high in young female smokers. In other words, a resistance develops against the FSH hormone in the ovaries and higher FSH hormone levels are required for the maturation of the egg. Thus, fertilization problems and missed periods can occur because of an absent reproductive cell. During the treatment of such patients with insufficient egg cell maturation, there is a 50% decrease in the success of the implantation (placement of the fertilized egg into the womb) and the continuation of the pregnancy in smokers when compared to nonsmokers. This means smoking significantly reduces ovarian functions, and ovarian stimulation becomes inadequate at earlier ages in women.

The negative effects of smoking on the reproductive system are also observed during the implementation of reproduction methods such as in vitro fertilization and assisted fertility technologies. The presence of high androgenic hormone levels (pre-metabolites of gender related hormones: androstenedione, DHEAS and testosterone/SHBG) in female smokers has been found to decrease the possibility of pregnancy during in vitro fertilization efforts.

Effects during pregnancy

There are many harmful consequences of smoking during pregnancy, especially for older women who are pregnant. Some of these consequences are premature birth, miscarriage, retardation of development, inadequate baby weight, perinatal mortality, ectopic pregnancy, placental praevia, and placental abruption. Placental praevia is the abnormal placement of placenta in the womb. In this case, depending on the excessive bleeding that occurs after the eighth month of gestation, the lives of the mother and fetus become imperiled, and fetal development is hindered. Placental abruption occurs depending on the premature separation of placenta from the womb, causing excessive bleeding that can also endanger the lives of the mother and baby.

In pregnant smokers, the postnatal ratio of infant mortality and disability increases as a consequence of deficiencies involving lung function and nerve development. These effects are directly proportional to how much a woman smokes. There are also negative impacts when a pregnant woman is exposed to second hand smoke by a spouse or close friend. Harmful metabolites of nicotine reach the baby via the placenta. Furthermore, nicotine is degraded slowly in the liver of a pregnant woman. Inadequate baby weight is related to smoking dosage and time.

Due to smoking in the early stages of pregnancy, the hormone levels of estriol, estradiol, progesterone and hCG, hPL which is secreted from the placenta, have been found to decrease. This reduction, which is observed in parallel with the amount of smoking, can result in miscarriages.

Toxic polyaromatic hydrocarbons have been found to accumulate at elevated ratios in the wombs of women who were exposed to cigarette smoke for a long time. During pregnancy, this situation leads to the deterioration of sertoli cells located in the reproductive glands of male fetuses. These glands assist in sperm production during adulthood, and damage to them can therefore cause a reduction in sperm generation.

An insufficient placental development occurs because of the negative effects of nicotine, cadmiums, and polyaromatic hydrocarbons damage the reproduction of trophoblast cells that make up the placenta. This situation explains the increasing miscarriage ratios among female smokers.

The free T4/TSH ratio in the serum of the umbilical cord, which connects the fetus to the placenta, increases in the babies of smokers compared to those of nonsmokers. This means that in babies of smokers, the thyroid glands may become overactive during birth. Depending on a mother’s smoking habits, this hyperactivity of the fetal thyroid increases the metabolic speed and the amount of consumed oxygen in the body, thus leading to the inadequate development of fetus.

Menopause occurs two-to-four years earlier due in women who smoke, as compared to non-smokers. This is due to the aging of the eggs. The risk of entering menopause before the age of 45 in women who quit smoking at least ten years prior is 87% less than smokers who don’t quit. Therefore, the earlier a woman stops smoking, the lower the risk of early menopause.

Effects of smoking on men

In research studies, it has been discovered that smoking has many harmful effects on testicular development and functions. These effects can be summarized as follows:

• Reduction of semen volume and quality, increase in its adhesiveness, delay in its becoming liquid, and resulting deformation of the sperm.

• Reduction in the number and mobility of sperm cells.

• Delayed sperm nucleus maturation, deteriorated DNA integrity.

• Decrease in the production of testosterone from Leyding cells.

• Decrease in the egg fertilization capacity of the sperm.

As a consequence of these negative effects, male infertility can occur. As the amount of daily cigarette consumption increases, the number, strength, and types of anomalies also increase. In a study conducted in 2010, smoking has been showed to decrease zinc levels in the seminal plasma. As a result of this decrease, oxidative agents populate and DNA breaks take place, thus causing a disruption of sperm functions and infertility. Zinc deficiency at the same time leads to the destruction of seminiferous tubule cells where sperm cells are produced. Paternal smoking generates negative results during the application of assisted fertility methods (such as in vitro fertilization). The damage in the sperm DNA of the father can disrupt the embryo development. The risk of anomalies, cancer, and genetic diseases increases for the fetus.

Cigarette smoking clearly occupies a position as one of the worst enemies of mankind because of its destructive effects on the body. In this case, it does not make any sense to try finding excuses for smoking, for it is harmful to the body that has been loaned to us as a gift and a temporary property.

Cihanoglu is a professor of medicine in KATU, Trabzon, Turkey.

The Fountain of Living Waters frames Christian Scriptures from beginning to end. In Genesis, the first book of the Torah, in the very first verse, we read: “In the beginning, when God began to create, the Earth was without form and void, and the Spirit of God moved over the face of the deep.” The deep in Hebrew is tehom. Such depth is not only the literal vastness of the primordial ocean; tehom also points us to the truth that creation comes from chaos. Life begins in the waters of the womb; cosmos originates in chaos.

Then, in the very last verses of Christian Scriptures, the Book of Revelation, another water image appears. The author borrows from the Prophet Ezekiel to envision the new Jerusalem, the city of peace. This city comes down from heaven, and in its center is a river of life. This river contains crystal clear water, washing away all violence, so that “nothing any more shall be accursed.” Living Waters flow through Christian Scriptures from alpha to omega.

The Holy Bible practically drips; 692 verses refer to waters. Prophet Moses leads the people of Israel to freedom through the waters of the Red (or Reed) Sea. Prophet Jonah doesn’t think it’s such a good idea to preach repentance to the people of Nineveh, Israel’s enemy, and embarks on a boat going the opposite direction. But God swallows him up in the belly of a whale, and he returns to the waters of creation, the chaos of tehom. And what does he do there? He prays. His prayer brings him safely to Nineveh, where out of the waters he brings the enemy to repentance. Living Water, the Fountain, turns enemies to allies. This truth is beautifully conveyed in perhaps the most famous Psalm, Psalm 23:

The Lord is my Shepherd. I shall not want. He makes me lie down in green pastures. He leads me beside still waters. He restores my soul. Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I shall fear no evil, for Thou art with me. Thou preparest a table before me in the company of my enemies. My cup overflows. Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life.

The Fountain overflows with abundance, to invite even enemies to the table of justice and mercy.

But the Fountain of our Source also dissolves our petty, ego-driven associations. Prophet Amos puts this best. The people of Israel in his day were unjust. They treated the poor with callous disregard, they didn’t educate their youth, they were violent. But they were also pious, praying five times a day (or the ancient equivalent, anyway!)

And hear what God says, through Amos: “I hate, I despise your festivals. The noise of your solemn assemblies hurts my ears … But let justice roll down like waters, and righteousness like an ever-flowing stream.”

The Fountain of love is not just a gentle flowing stream. It’s also a tsunami of the power of love that sweeps away all our pretenses. The Fountain throws us unto the mercy of an infinite flood of justice.

Of course, for Christians like me, this merciful and just Fountain also points to, indeed is incarnate within Jesus. Jesus is Living Waters. The story that most clearly conveys this metaphor is in the Gospel of John, where Jesus meets a Samaritan woman by a well and asks her for a drink. She asks him what he’s doing there, for being at a well was woman’s work, and Jesus’ disciples are scandalized, because rabbis didn’t talk to women, much less Samaritans (who were racially “other”). And to make matters worse, this woman has been married five times, and she is now living with a man who is not her husband.

But Jesus tells her: “The water that you give me will only temporarily quench my thirst. But the water I give to you is living waters, and it will well up in you to eternal life.”

And this woman cries out: “Give me this water!” And Jesus says: “I am he.”

Jesus is innocent and perfect compassion. He is a drink of water on a hot day. He is mercy for outcasts, for the poor, for sinners like this Samaritan woman. And what he brings is the possibility that we, too, might live compassionate lives. So the woman goes and tells her neighbors: “I’ve met the Messiah!” She has been washed in the Fountain.

Once we lose our attachment to petty associations, we can live for others, out of true grace. “Whoever seeks to save one’s life,” Jesus teaches, “will lose it. But whoever gives up one’s life for my sake and for the sake of the good news (the gospel), will find true life.”

True life is a life lived for others. This doesn’t entail masochism, but instead offers fulfillment. Psychologists teach that when we are fully engaged in a task we lose the usual blinders of self-consciousness and enter into what they call “flow.” We’re “in the zone,” whether at work, at play, or in love. The point is this: when we love, we truly live.

This is why Lutheran Christians like myself celebrate the baptism of infants. Sometimes, baptism is misunderstood as a one-time event: you get dunked and you’re done. In fact, baptism is more like a first contact with the Fountain. Metaphorically, it can be experienced daily, even many times a day.

Whenever we wash, we can be reminded of our Source. Whenever it rains, we can remember the Fountain. Whenever we take a drink, we can give thanks to God for the mercy of compassion.

All in all, then, baptism is not unlike wudu—the washing of regeneration—that prepares us to pray. As the Apostle Paul urged us, “Pray constantly.” This doesn’t mean doing salat perpetually, it means being aware of our Source. Praying constantly means giving up petty attachments or associations, such as greed, anger, and violence. And praying constantly means giving ourselves away in acts of compassion. When we find the flow of love, we live.

Reading The Fountain as a Christian connects me not only to a magazine, but also to a profound metaphor. The Fountain reminds us of our Source, dissolves petty egoist attachments as we learn about our world, and invites us to join the flow of compassionate living. And isn’t that worth at least the price of a subscription?

The 300 to 500 sperms which strive to enter into egg meet with the cell layer (corona radiata) which is being serially positioned around the zona radiata. A liquid is secreted from this zona radiata which punctures the euchromosome¹ placed on tip of sperm. Each of various enzymes set free following the puncture of euchromosome is assigned to overcome a separate obstacle before the sperm. Duty of the hyaluronidase enzyme, for instance, is to puncture the outer cell layer (corona radiata) which is assigned to protect the egg. Resultantly, the sperm passes through this cell layer and sticks onto the zona radiata (zona pellucida). The quasi-trypsin dissolutive (proteolytic) enzymes are employed for overcoming the zona radiata. Only one or rarely two of the few sperms which stuck onto this zona radiata manages to penetrate into the egg. It has been estimated that plurality of sperms around the egg, contrary to their rarity, facilitates their entry into the egg.

The sperm penetrates into the egg with its tail but tail membrane stays outside. The protective membrane of the ovum (zona pellucida) starts diffusing calcium within the very first minutes of sperm’s penetration and resultantly, granules are released, receptors are exterminated and the egg becomes structurally transformed. Consequently, a thick layer is formed over the protective membrane (zona pellucida) for prevention of penetration of another sperm.

Following the sperm’s penetration into egg (cytoplasm), the “fusion” process starts. Fusion is the unification process of sperm and egg cells (pronuclei) each of which are separately containing 23 chromosomes. Thus, construction of a genetical library which is containing 46 chromosomes and being prerequisite of formation (creation) of a new human baby is completed. Afterwards, the first mitotic division gives way to a double-celled zygote and the embryo starts forming while settling into the secure base of the uterus. As the outcoming child is going to be a mixture, i.e., a genuine and particular blend of the genetic codes available in the inherited gene pool, he/she will have resemblance to his/her parents and thus to their reciprocal kins (paternal and maternal grandparents, uncles and aunts and etc.).

Prophet Muhammad and Genetics

Prophet Muhammad, peace be upon him, pointed in his various sayings and explanations to the fact that the baby in mother’s womb carries a number of genetic features (characteristics) which are being inherited from the parents:

When a Jewish person asked Him, “what is man created from?” he replied: “Man is created from a blend (mixture) of zygotes of both man and woman.” Then the Jew said: “Moses as well said the same before you.”²

Prophet Muhammad, peace be upon him, also shed light onto the fact of resemblance or inheritance of character by way of genes:

“Is bathing a must for women?” asked Umm Sulaim to the Prophet.

“Yes, it is a must when her seminal fluid outflows and seen,” he replied.

“Do women have wet dreams?” she asked.

“May God grant you goodness! How otherwise a child resembles to his/her mother?” He replied.³

….

As seen and understood by His above hadith (saying), He who was the great teacher of mankind was the first person who said that women do also see wet dreams.

He has also been the first person who articulated the concept of “dominancy,” which was not understood before 1850s.

He said:

“The child resembles to either side of the parents whose seminal fluid comes to the fore and surpasses the other’s in mother’s womb during the intercourse. If there is an equilibrium, then, resemblance is also in equilibrium for both sides.”⁴

“If, during the intercourse, seminal fluid of the man precedes and surpasses that of the woman, then, the child resembles to the father, and if semimal fluid of the woman precedes and surpasses that of the man, then, the child resembles to the mother.”⁵

“If seminal fluid of the woman surpasses that of the man, then, the child resembles to his/her maternal uncles, and, if seminal fluid of the man surpasses that of the woman, then, the child resembles to his/her paternal uncles.”⁶

In another one of His sayings, He points out to the fact that the recessive characters (features) in the grand ancestorial gene pool would dominantly and collectively emerge after following a couple of generations:

“A man having a blackish baby boy approached and said to the Prophet:

“I am suspecting my wife.”

“Do you have camels?” the Prophet asked him.

“Yes,” he replied.

“Then, how are their colors?” The Prophet asked.

“Red.”

“Is there any one with grey color among them?”

“Yes, there is.”

“Then, where did this grey color come from?” asked the Prophet.

“Presumably from a line of its ancestors,” the man responded.

“Here you are! This child of you is also presumed to be coming from a line of your ancestors,” the Prophet told the man.⁷

Dr. Arslan Mayda is a medical doctor at Sifa Hospital in Izmir, Turkey.

Notes and References

1. An euchromosome zone enriched by lysosome enzymes is noticed on stem of a mature sperm cell. The lysosome enzymes penetrate into the egg cell and impregnate it.

2. Ahmad Bin Hanbal, Aynee, Ramouz Al Ahadeeth, Kanz Al Ummal, Jami’ul Saghir

3. Bukhari, Muslim, Abu Dawoud, Aynee, Ahmad Bin Hanbal.

4. Muslim, Ibn Majah.

5. Bukhari, Ahmad Bin Hanbal.

6. Bukhari, Muslim, Abu Dawoud.

7. Abu Dawoud, Muslim, Ahmad Bin Hanbal, Ibn Majah.

Mary was given her name by her mother. Her name has been said to mean “the one who does not want, one who departs” or “the servant,” but the opinion that the name Mary means “one who worships” in the Aramaic language1 seems more suitable.

The guardianship of Zachariah

Mary’s honorable family upbringing, the fact that she was a chosen person, and her many outstanding virtues are emphasized frequently in both the Qur’an and hadith. However, the verses of the Qur’an alone are more than sufficient to explain her superiority as a woman. Firstly, she came from an honorable family, a father as noble as Imran and a mother so memorable and devoted that her prayers were accepted by God. Mary was the fruit of a devoted mother’s prayer and because of her oath she was entrusted to a holy sanctuary at a very young age.

When her father Imran died,2 Mary was still only a young girl and many asked for the honorable duty of her guardianship, but this duty was bestowed upon Prophet Zachariah3 in an event that was revealed in the Holy Qur’an: “(O Messenger:) that is of the tidings of the things of the unseen (the things that took place in the past and have remained hidden from people with all their truth), which We reveal to you, for you were not present with them when they drew lots with their pens about who should have charge of Mary; nor were you present with them when they were disputing (about the matter)” (Al Imran 3:44). The Qur’anic verse which describes how Mary’s sustenance comes to her is immediately followed by a supplication from Zachariah that clearly indicates that he was growing old and was slowly becoming incapable of looking after Mary adequately. This is the most likely reason for the weak reports claiming that the person who was blessed with her guardianship was a priest called Juraich4 or a member of her family called Joseph,5 but these reports have no authority, for God revealed in the Qur’an that Mary was living under the education and care of Zachariah.6

Mary was blessed with sustenance from God

Zachariah made Mary a sanctuary7 in the temple so she could be more occupied with daily worship.8 During the period that Mary lived at the temple under the guidance of Zachariah, she was exceptionally blessed with sustenance from God. The Qur’an informs us that every time Zachariah went to see Mary, there would be lovely fruits in her room: “Whenever Zachariah went in to her in the Sanctuary, he found her provided with food. ‘Mary,’ he asked, ‘how does this come to you?’ ‘From God,’ she answered. Truly God provides to whomever He wills without reckoning”(Al Imran 3:37).9 It is also known that after giving birth to baby Jesus, she was miraculously provided with the blessing of fresh dates and water. A similar event is reported for Fatima, the Prophet Muhammad’s daughter.10

There is no information about Mary’s life before the angel came giving Mary the glad tidings of Jesus’s birth. But the books of Apocrypha (accounts rejected by the Church) convey the blessing of sustenance bestowed upon Mary. However, the Apocrypha give some information about the earlier period of Mary’s life, including predictions as to where she was born and even estimations regarding the date of her birth. The Protoevangelium, one of the books of Apocrypha, contains some additional information which is not found in the canonical scriptures (those accepted by the Church).

The Sanctuary and sense of servitude

While she increased her worship with every day that passed, the period that Mary was under the care of Zachariah continued with God’s special protection and sustenance. This particular characteristic is mentioned in the Qur’an: “And (in due time came the moment) when the angels said: “Mary, God has chosen you and made you pure, and exalted you above all the women in the world. “Mary, be devoutly obedient to your Lord, prostrate and bow (in the Prayer and devotion to Him) with those who bow!”(Al Imran 3:42–43).11

The words of the Creator’s purification of Mary-“God’s purification”-have been interpreted in various ways as referring to spiritual, moral, or physical purification. Some said that this means “purification from disbelief and sin,” while others claim this means “purification from menses following birth, all kinds of physical defect and contact with males,” and most scholars say the words “chosen above women of all nations” refers to all the women of her era,12 and though the physical actions of worship are stressed in this verse, more important is the fact that Mary abided by both the command of worship, “be devoutly obedient to your Lord, prostrate and bow (in the Prayer and devotion to Him) with those who bow!” and the spirit of worship deep in her soul: “And also Mary, the daughter of ‘Imran, who kept herself chaste (body and soul), so We breathed into it out of Our Spirit, and who affirmed the truth of the words of her Lord, and His Books; and she was of those devoutly obedient to God” (At-Tahrim 66:12).

The Qur’an also bears witness to Mary being a woman of “truth”13 in many verses.

Mary’s superiority to all women

The verse in the Qur’an about Mary being superior to all other women (Al Imran 3:42–43) has been referred to in most commentaries as well as various reports of hadith found in the Tisa Qutubi. About the many virtues of Mary, the Prophet Muhammad, peace be upon him, said:

1. “The best of the women in the world is Mary (in her lifetime),14 and the best of the women in the world is Khadijah (in her lifetime).” (Bukhari, Muslim)

2. “Many among men attained perfection, but among women none attained perfection except Mary the daughter of Imran, and Asiya the wife of Pharaoh; and the superiority of Aisha to other women is like the superiority of Tharid (an Arabic dish) to other meals.” (Bukhari, Muslim)

3. “There is no new-born except that (at the moment of birth) Satan disturbs him, so he begins to cry from Satan’s disturbance with the exception of the son of Mary and his mother.” (Bukhari, Muslim)

4. “Of all the women in the universe, four would suffice (as an example for others): Mary, Asiya, Khadija, and Fatima.” (Tirmidhi, Ahmad b. Hanbal)

5. “The best of the women of Paradise are Khadijah, Fatima, Asiya and Mary.” (Ahmad b. Hanbal)

6. “Fatima is the leader of the women of Paradise after Mary.” (Tirmidhi, Ahmad b. Hanbal)

7. “The best women among the camel riders, are the women of Quraish.” (Another narrator said) The Prophet said, “The righteous among the women of Quraish are those who are kind to their young ones and who look after their husband’s property,” (Bukhari, Muslim) and this hadith is followed up in many cases by a report from Abu Hurairah who said, “Mary the daughter of Imran never rode a camel,” stressing the virtues of Mary. According to Imam Nawawi and Ibn Hajar, Abu Hurairah’s aim was not actually to stress the fact that Mary never rode a camel but was just an expression of his praise of Mary’s virtues,15 or another explanation of these words could be, “It does not mean that a woman who rides a camel is righteous because Mary was a righteous woman even though she never rode a camel.”

As we see from these hadith the interpreters and scholars have varying opinions on the order of arrangement of the superiority of these women, but the most interesting aspect of these hadith is that although the other names may change, Mary is the only person who is mentioned in all the given examples of these hadith, and this should be sufficient to show her unmatched excellence.

Mary’s being among the Prophets

The narrations stated above have led some scholars to believe that there is a possibility of the existence of female prophets. There has been various opinions supporting the idea that female prophets may have been sent and asking whether Mary the mother of Jesus was a Prophet or not. The opinion of scholars who believe Mary may have been a Prophet is based on the fact that Mary’s name is mentioned in the Qur’an among the Prophets: “Those were some of the Prophets on whom God did bestow his grace of the posterity of Adam and of those whom we carried (in the Ark) with Noah and of the posterity of Abraham and Israel-of those we guided and chose”(Mary 19:58), and also on the angel bringing the revelation of tidings and the benevolence provided to Mary from the creator, and the fact that she was a chosen person above all women purified through the grace of God as a “woman of perfection,” and “leader in Paradise”16 all led these scholars to believe that Mary could possibly be a messenger. However, the general opinion accepted by most scholars is that women were not sent to the world as prophets.17

There are some Christian theologians who claim that Mary was a prophet. The Christian opinion in general is that she was superior to other women and saints but not superior to Jesus. Mary has been widely praised in Christian literature for her obedience, patience, modesty, piety, faith, hope, compassion, dignity and many other virtues.

Mary: the monument of chastity

The Qur’an clearly explains in this verse how Mary conceived Jesus:

And (remember) when the angels said: “Mary, God gives you the glad tidings of a Word from Him, to be called the Messiah, Jesus son of Mary” highly honored in the world and the Hereafter, and one of those near-stationed to God. He will speak to people in the cradle and in manhood, and he is of the righteous. “Lord,” said Mary, “how shall I have a son seeing no mortal has ever touched me?” “That is how it is,” he (the Spirit who appeared before her) said, (quoting God): “God creates whatever He wills; when He decrees a thing, He does but say to it ‘Be!’ and it is.”(Al Imran 3:45–47)

The chapter Mary (19:16–33) of the Qur’an gives an extensive version of the conception, the birth and the events that followed the birth of baby Jesus. Furthermore, God the Almighty reveals how He located Mary and her son Jesus, whom He sent as an example to humans, in a prosperous place on high land with flowing streams and bestowed upon Jesus the divine benevolence He had bestowed upon his mother: “O Jesus son of Mary! O Jesus, son of Mary! Remember My favor upon you and upon your mother” (Al-Maeda 5:110).

There are various reports and comments specifically referring to Mary’s conception of Jesus and the miraculous birth in the interpretations and explanations of hadith which exceed the limits of this article. The embryologic phase of Mary’s pregnancy was just like any other pregnant woman: she conceived, the baby grew in her womb, and when the contractions began she made her way to the vicinity of the date tree behind a flowing stream and then gave birth. But how did the pregnancy and this embryological process actually begin? This question resembles a parcel holding the mysteries of this miraculous event.

So in brief, Mary was a true monument of chastity and, even though she was a virgin, conceived in a miraculous way. The fact that Mary guarded both her dignity and chastity is emphasized in the following verses of the Qur’an:

“And (mention) that blessed woman who set the best example in guarding her chastity. We breathed into her out of Our Spirit, and We made her and her son a miraculous sign (of Our Power and matchless way of doing things) for all the worlds.” (Al-Anbiya 21–91), “And also Mary, the daughter of Imran, who kept herself chaste (body and soul), so We breathed into it out of Our Spirit, and who affirmed the truth of the words of her Lord, and His Books; and she was of those devoutly obedient to God.” (At-Tahrim 66:12).

As a matter of fact, the Qur’an tells us that great disaster and punishment await those who speak unfavorably about Mary, for whatever they say against her chastity and dignity is slander, and their hearts are sealed to faith.

Mary’s death and burial

There is no account in the Qur’an or hadith of Mary’s death or burial, so details and information related to the topic are generally based on Christian sources or historical literature. Not included in the synoptic gospels (Matthew, Mark, Luke), Mary’s attending the miracle of Cana (John 2:11) and the event of the crucifix (John 19:25–27) were only reported in the book of John; she prayed with Jesus and his disciples in the Acts (1:14) following his resurrection, but there is no mention of the remaining period of her life, her death, age, or appearance in any of the gospels.

It is estimated that Mary must have been around fifty years old at the time of Jesus’ passing and there are varying reports regarding her own death; some say she was fifty-six, while there are other reports of her being seventy or even seventy-two. The questions of where and how she died have been topics of discussion and dispute for centuries, but the fact that she carried on throughout her life in sincere devotion and worship of God is much more suitable for her general profile.

Although there is no information on Mary’s place of burial in Christian sources, there are different views. Some say she was buried in Jerusalem, whereas others say it could have been in Ephesus or Antioch. Although there is no specific grave associated with Mary in Ephesus, there are graves said to be that of Mary which are in churches, one in the Jehosaphat valley between the Mount of Olives and Mount Temple and another in Gethsemani. There are some claims that her grave is on the mountain of Sion, and a Syrian history writer claims that her grave is situated in Al-Faradis in Damascus.18

Notes

1. Zamahshari, I, 142; Bagawi, I, 295; Baydawi, II, 31.

2. Hakim, Mustadrak II, 646; Tabari, III, 235; Zamahshari, I, 142.

3. See Al Imran 3:37, 44. Also Ibn Hisham, III, 121; Tabari, III, 242-244.

4. Ibn Hisham, III, 121.

5. Ibn Kathir, Bidayah II, 68; Alusi, III, 165, XVI, 80.

6. See Al Imran 3:37. Also see: Tabari, III, 242-244; Qurtubi, IV, 71-86.

7. Mihrab is the original Qur’anic word. A bit different than its meaning today, mihrab in this context refers to a place “where one lives and prays, a most honorable place, where one strives against the carnal self.”

8. Tabari, III, 245; Wahidi, I, 208; Baydawi, II, 34.

9. See also Tabari, III, 244-246; Baqawi, I, 297; Fahruddin ar-Razi, VI, 283.

10. Zamahshari, I, 143; Ibn Kathir, I, 361.

11. See also New Testament, Luke 1:26–28; 41–42.

12. Tabari, III, 262-264; Vahidi, I, 210.

13. Al- Maidah 5:75. The word “Truth” means trustworthy, of truthful speech pious in faith and religion. Ibn Manzur, “s-d-k” (X, 193)

14. Scholars like Qadi Iyaz and Qurtubi understood the meaning of these words as “superior to all women on the earth.”

15. Navawi, XVI, 80; Ibn Hajar, VI, 473-474, IX, 125.

16. Navawi, XV, 198; Ayni, XV, 308.

17. Navawi, XV, 198; Baydawi, II, 38; Ibn Kathir, II, 82; Ayni, XV, 308. Those who support this view usually refer to this verse: “We did not send before you as Messengers any but men to whom We revealed, from amongst the people of the townships (where We raised them)” (Yusuf 12:109).

18. Ibn Asakir, Tarih al-Dimashk II, 337, 411.

In the winter of 2007, I met Dr. Ayse Coskun at a Turkish Women’s Coffee Night at the Raindrop Foundation in Houston, Texas. I had been attending the Coffee Nights for a few months and mentioned to Dr Coskun that, while I enjoyed the social events, I found myself wanting to go deeper. I did not want to take classes exactly; instead, I wanted to do interfaith dialogue in an informal rather than an academic setting. Almost immediately Dr. Coskun suggested that we meet for lunch. We lunched together several times: an American Christian and a Turkish Muslim at an Asian-fusion restaurant with statues of Buddha as decoration! I was charmed by Dr. Coskun’s openness, humor, and obvious intellect. Ayse made me feel comfortable, and she seemed to enjoy me as much as I did her. God’s blessing was with us as we laughed and planned.

Ayse and I decided to contact women from diverse faith traditions to see if they might like to share our interest in learning about one another’s religious perspectives. We agreed that our group should be small (8-12 women) and consist, at least at first, of only people from Abrahamic traditions (to simplify matters). We also decided that our “experiment” would have a time limit (8 months, meeting 2 hours each month) so that those we invited would not have to make an indefinite commitment. To my shame, Ayse had to do all the inviting, because I knew only Presbyterians! Ayse invited another Muslim woman (new to Houston, but familiar with interfaith dialogue). She also invited a young Roman Catholic woman and a Conservative Jewish chaplain, who in turn invited another Jewish woman. Rounding out the group was a member of the Unity Church of Christianity and two others who had explored a variety of other traditions. Later a Quaker (Religious Society of Friends) seminary professor and another Roman Catholic joined us.

At our first meeting I experienced no awkwardness or hesitation. Each woman listened to the others with delight and respect. Our meeting did tend to be a bit chaotic, not because we were disorderly but because we were extremely curious. It was like wandering through a magical forest with a group of precocious children; everyone had unusual questions and surprising insights. (Fortunately Dr. Coskun would, after one of our diversions, gently but firmly coax us back to the topic at hand.)

Gradually we created an agenda, but even that was adjusted (or ignored) as situations drew us in different directions. For example, at first we began and closed our meetings with prayers offered by individuals who represented various traditions; we heard prayers in Hebrew, in Arabic, and from St. Francis and St. Augustine. In time however, while we still closed with prayer by an individual, we began to open our meetings with a unison prayer written by our Jewish chaplain (see sidebar), because it seemed to speak directly to what we were about.

Our agenda also began to include a time for sharing personal concerns, because we realized that we wanted to know one another as persons, not simply as “token” Jews, Presbyterians, etc. Therefore, when Dr. Coskun told us during a recent Personal Concerns Time (PCT) that she had to return to Turkey to help care for her ailing mother, we were able to respond immediately. We asked her to teach us a Turkish prayer for healing and promised to pray daily for her mother. It was during our PCT that the Jewish Chaplain told of bombing threats to her synagogue and a Catholic told of several instances of vandalism at her church. One of our group then volunteered to draft a letter as a basis for correspondence that might be sent to all places of worship that receive threats or damage. Often our Personal Concerns Time lasts only briefly; sometimes, as in the above cases, it leads to prayer and action.

The major portion of our meetings has consisted of sharing parts of our scriptures, giving overviews of our various faith traditions, or considering a specific issue from the point of view of our culture and faith. We have also laughed together, eaten together, and spent time exploring the kosher kitchens and touching the beautiful Torah scrolls at a synagogue. Most importantly, we have talked about topics that probably would not have been included in an academic setting. For example, the subject of our last meeting was “Mothers.” We first wrote down adjectives describing our own mothers and found that, despite our different cultures, many of our mothers could be described similarly: selfless, loving, forgiving, religious, and stoic amidst difficulty.

As we turned to what our various faith traditions had to say about mothers, most of us quoted from our scriptures. The Muslims pointed to the section of the Qur’an that dealt with justice, citing many passages about the high respect given to mothers in Islam, respect even above that given to fathers. Mothers (as well as fathers) are to be obeyed in all matters except when obedience would go against service to Allah or might bring harm to someone else. According to Muslim law, children are not to argue with or even say “oof” to a mother. Mothers (and sisters as well) are to be cared for financially by the eldest son. There are also rules governing the benevolent treatment of widows, orphans and stepmothers.

The Roman Catholics pointed to the importance of the Virgin Mary. Mary is considered to be not only the mother of Jesus but also the Queen of Heaven and, given Jesus’ instructions from the cross, the mother of all Christians: “Woman, behold your son; . . . Son, behold your mother” (John 19). While Catholics do not worship Mary, women, in particular, pray to her because Mary experienced the problems and pain of being a girl, a young mother, and a grieving mother, all the while being faithful to what God required of her.

Jewish contributions to the discussion included the law to “Honor your father and mother.” Depending upon how one interprets that law, it can be considered more strict or less strict than the Muslim “Obey your father and mother.” Jews stress the importance of “honoring” parents, even if the parents are abusive and cannot be “loved.” Many stories in Hebrew scripture extol good mothers (Moses’ mother who risked her life that her son might live (Exodus 2), and the mother in I Kings 3, who chose to give her child to another rather than have him cut in two. Many of the Jewish laws regarding the Sabbath apply only to men, because women are the keepers of the family and must be free to do unexpected chores if needed. Unfortunately, in recent years, Jewish comedians have made their mothers the object of jokes; damaging stereotypes have arisen from this practice.

While the Protestants hold Jesus’ mother in high esteem, they do not have the same special feelings about Mary as do Catholics. In general, the Protestants had less to add about mothers, except the household code in Ephesians 5, which is St. Paul’s list of reciprocal responsibilities for family members. The Protestants pointed out, however, that portions of the household code (“Wives, be subject to your husbands as to the Lord”) have been emphasized while other portions (“Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.”) have been less emphasized, with the result that women (even wives and mothers) have often been devalued in Christian culture.

The above discussion was particularly pertinent to us women, but given that we added intimate stories about our own mothers and laughed (with a degree of sadness and shame) at the jokes about Jewish mothers, the session would probably have informed/entertained men as well. Our conversation went so long that we had to delete the Business portion of our meeting. And we all agreed that the talk of “Mothers” needed to be expanded to include religious perspectives on women in general. We are also eager to tackle topics such as “Weddings and Funerals,” “Art, Music, and Poetry,” and “Angels and Jinns.”

Early in our time together we decided to call ourselves WIN (Women’s Interfaith Network). As well as describing what we hope to be, the acronym is appropriate because we feel like we are “winners” already, having enjoyed one another these past months. We will probably never completely understand one another’s faith or customs, but we have come to appreciate and trust one another. Perhaps appreciation and trust is even more important than understanding because, while the latter connotes mainly an intellectual connection, the former implies that one sees the reflection of God in the other. For myself, I now even see the others differently in a physical sense: the younger women seem more beautiful, even radiant; and the older women seem both softer and stronger. All have become persons I admire, and I thank God for the blessing of their good and energetic presences in the world.

Before the end of our committed time, several have expressed an interest in continuing and expanding the group. In fact, even before our experiment was half over, several wanted to add friends-an indication of how valuable and enriching we think WIN has been. We have begun work on Mission and Vision Statements and are brain-storming about how best to proceed. As WIN members have offered their ideas, I have begun to see how our special relationship might benefit the community around us. I have also begun to understand in a tangible way that, while I often pray for peace in the larger world, God’s will towards that goal includes small efforts of people like those in WIN, joining to live out peace on a local level.

Truly, both as a group and as individual women, WIN has been God’s special blessing to me.

“Borei Ha’ Olam, Creator of the stars, sun and moon,

“We are mindful of Your world and our responsibilities to it. Bless all who gather here today that we might become leaders of change and visionaries of human rights and freedom. Sustain us with courage and endurance that we may sustain one another. Renew our hopes and heal our wounds.

“Compassionate and merciful God, may the joy and celebration of this occasion remain as a source of inspiration and dedication to pursue higher ideals for many years to come. We seek Your guidance so that we might have the courage to advance the cause of internalizing oneness and thereby spread God’s shelter of peace and dignity for all humankind.

“Let us find unity in the commonality of our searching and in the sameness of our quest for peace and equality for all. Amen.”

A prayer written by Jewish Chaplain Bobbie Osadchey and prayed in unison at the open of each WIN meeting.

I began my research by reading all the Turkish material I could find on the subject. Most of the works I found were Turkish translations of European travelers’ reports about Ottoman life. Of course, it was necessary to separate fact from fiction, because many travelers, males in particular, described aspects of Ottoman life they had never personally seen-the inside of the harem, for example. But in spite of this, I was able to glean a fairly accurate description of Ottoman women and the harem from a number of different travelers (mostly women) who can be considered as eye witnesses to harem life. The portrait of Ottoman women that emerged reflected a very feminine appearance and demeanor, refined manners and decorum, and a pious and chaste character. Their domestic roles of wife and mother further reinforced this strongly feminine image.

The portrait of Ottoman women I found from my reading was a far cry from the Orientalists’ exotic stereotype. I learned that only approximately ten percent of the young slave girls in the imperial harem were actually royal concubines, and this number included concubines to the princes as well as to the sultan. The rest were groomed and trained for service to the royal family by means of the administrative hierarchy in the imperial harem. Even the belly dance, which is always associated with slave girls in the harem, apparently did not even exist in the imperial harem. That is what we are told by Leyla Saz Hanýmefendi who grew up in the palace from the age of four and who was closely associated with the royal family during the reign of six different sultans during the nineteenth and twentieth centuries. Armed with the information and knowledge I had gained from many travelers’ reports and secondary sources, I felt ready to challenge the sensationalist myth of the harem. Little did I know at the time, however, that an even greater discovery regarding Ottoman women awaited me in future research.

By a quirk of fate, I found myself spending a year with my daughter who was studying for a master’s degree in Islamic studies at a leading North American university. One of the courses she took was related to the Muslim qadi or judge and Ottoman court records. Much to my amazement I learned that throughout the duration of the Ottoman state (six centuries) women had many significant legal rights, more perhaps during that time than any other women in the world. This was a point that had been somehow overlooked in the many sensationalist books on the harem! Investigating this point further, I learned that Ottoman women had legal agency or, in other words, they could sue and be sued in court independent of their husbands. They could enter into legal contracts like marriage contracts with their husbands, or into business contracts with others. They had the right to own property and to inherit it. They had the right to initiate divorce. They had full control over their own income and property and could do with it as they wished. Ottoman women also had the right to be guardian of their children in case of the death of or divorce from their husband. European women, on the other hand, gained these rights much later, and today in some parts of the world women are still struggling to obtain them. British women, for example, did not have these rights until 1882. Previous to that time they had to turn over any property, inheritance or income to their husband upon marriage. Women did not have legal agency nor were they able to make legal contracts independently. Also they were unable to defend themselves in divorce cases and they could not get legal guardianship of their own children.

Furthermore, I learned that not only did Ottoman women have these legal rights, but that they actively pursued their rights as well. There are thousands of court records that attest to this. By no means were legal rights enjoyed just by a privileged few. They were accorded to Ottoman women of all social and economic strata. For example, one of my favorite cases was taken from early seventeenth-century Kayseri court records. It involves a woman named Teslime who was working on her land when her neighbor’s donkey strayed onto her property. When she seized the animal, her neighbor, who was a man, cursed her. Teslime immediately filed a complaint with the local qadi. Two witnesses were found to support her complaint and she won her case. While reading her case, I could not help but wonder how many women today would take a man to court for cursing them; and if they did so, how many would be taken seriously? There are countless recorded cases of Ottoman women who turned to the courts to get redress for injustices perpetrated against them. Upon review of such cases a different image of the Ottoman woman in the legal arena emerged: a strong and courageous woman who put Haqq (Truth and Justice) above everything else.

It was the discovery of this side of Ottoman women that really clenched my respect and admiration for them, because it enlightened me in regard to how Muslim women should be. They were not only very feminine and refined, but they were also strong defenders of Haqq. Their feminine and masculine natures were amazingly well balanced. As a Muslim convert, I have found the female model I was looking for. Whenever I get into trouble, I first ask myself, “What would an Ottoman woman do?”

Furthermore, I discovered that the spiritual nature of women was honored in Ottoman society.

Ottoman women were honored in the harem, not imprisoned there. Unfortunately, this way of perceiving women has all but been lost today. Much of the time women are perceived mainly as physical beings and, in its lowest form, as sex objects. They are often valued to the degree that they can rival the accomplishments of men. Ottoman women, however, were honored and valued as women.

I wanted to share these discoveries with others. I began lecturing on the subject of Ottoman women in Turkey, and these lectures eventually led to a small book in Turkish entitled, “Osmanlý Toplumunda Kadýn ve Aile (Women and Family in Ottoman Society).” Later on I began thinking about writing a book on Ottoman women in English-not an academic work, but a book giving a general overview that would appeal to any Western reader interested in the subject of women. Again, I rolled up my sleeves and set to work. As the book took form, so did my concept of how the book should be illustrated. I wanted it to reflect the spirit of the Ottoman woman-the beauty and harmony and refinement of her life. Once Tughra Books (formerly The Light, Inc.) agreed to publish the book and the design concept was agreed upon, members of their graphics design department did an extraordinary job that eventually led to the book being a finalist for the 2008 PMA Benjamin Franklin Award in the category of cover design/large format.

My book was published under the title “Ottoman Women: Myth and Reality” at the end of 2007. In the spring of 2008 I went on a book promotion tour in some major US cities: Los Angeles, New York, Washington D.C., Atlanta, Pittsburg, Rochester and Newark. The people I met and spoke to-men and women, young and old, American and Turkish, Muslim and non-Muslim-all responded positively to the book. Many were surprised to learn about the high social status of Ottoman women, particularly about their legal rights. Some, young Turks in particular, were thankful that the myth of the harem was finally being challenged. Almost all commented on the beautiful design of the book. The highlight of the tour occurred on the evening of the annual PMA publishing awards dinner in Los Angeles. That night my long journey of discovery in regard to Ottoman women was crowned when my book won the PMA Benjamin Franklin publishing award in the category of history/politics.

As a final comment, I would like to mention the great contribution to the book of my now deceased son, Sahin Sancar. He was with me every step of the way, from the signing of the contract with my publisher to the final touches in the design. He was a beautiful person and he contributed greatly to the beauty of the book. May he live eternally in beauty and light.

Asli Sancar has two more books and numerous articles, mainly dealing with women and family.

This book by the author, entitled “Ottoman Women: Myth and Reality,” combines both splendid design and objective narration, and could be referred to as a proof of the real status of women at that time giving full information on every aspect of their lives.

World of women-not as seen on TV

In our time when the rights of women are not well protected but are at least widely spoken about, it is very important to have research on the position of Ottoman women based not on common imagination (sometimes very colourful), but on the historical truth.

Unfortunately the further the topic moves to the East the more deviated the data becomes. Remarks untrue from the very beginning are more and more likely to be decorated with what-somebody-thinks-(s)he-could-have-seen. So for decades, when it came to the issue of a woman living in Muslim society there were only two options: whether a sultan’s harem full of silk, coffee, gold, hatred and intrigues or a harem in a mud house managed by a cruel and uneducated husband.

The truth had always been a card – laid at the table, played and beaten. Real facts were mixed with fruits of imagination; objective data was presented only when it could have been useful for the narrator.

In her book the author successfully presents the real state of affairs proving her point of view by documents from Ottoman records and remarks by Western travelers. Ottoman society was a highly organized and sophisticated system, so the position of a woman – should the issue concern her life in a household harem, childbirth and custody, charity and social activities – was regulated by religion and law. Even the foreigners disliking Muslim society and bearing hostility towards the Ottoman Empire, in particular, could not help but admit that Ottoman women enjoyed much more freedom and were way more respected and loved than their Christian sisters.

Ottoman woman: social position, rights, life in the harem

This research consists of six main chapters describing all the main aspects of Ottoman women’s lives. The chapters are dedicated to description of Ottoman women by Western travelers, life in the household harem, the status of slaves in the harem, the imperial harem, Ottoman women in court records and the metaphysical meaning of being a woman in the Ottoman Empire. The first chapter presents observations through Westerners eyes. Placing this part at the beginning is quite logical in respect to putting things in order and separating proven documentary facts from the fairy tale. Special attention was paid to the remarks of several female travelers and persons who had stayed in the Ottoman Empire for a long time and thus witnessed Ottoman life.

Even travelers’ comments needed to be studied with great care. Their accuracy had to be taken into consideration. The Ottomans would never have tolerated any interfering in their private life, so even female travelers with well-established diplomatic connections were accepted into the Ottoman harems with great restrictions.

Arabian nights vs. Ottoman daylight: outbeating the harem myth

When a woman needs to struggle with an enemy, she does it in a very delicate, feminine way. Here we see the author beating the harmful myth of harem life in a very confident and logical manner. “Women are not prisoners in any sense of the word, nor are they pining behind the latticed windows as we are sometimes led to believe…,” Elizabeth Cooper wrote in 1916.

Starting the second chapter of the book dedicated to life in the household harem by breaking with a popular myth presenting Ottoman and thus Oriental women as prisoners of their homes, is both bold and logical. It can be clearly seen that Ottoman women were never captives of their part of the house. But the fantasies of the Arabian nights made her image a hostage to common opinion in Western eyes. French translation of Arabian tales published in Europe at the beginning of XVIII century served the Ottoman women badly, turning them into sensual, infidel, vile creatures inventing one intrigue after another while spending their days in the sweet laziness of the harem.

Contradiction between exotic tales and reality should be solved fairly – this is what the author wants, and what women would have desired. They were secluded because they were loved and cared about, not imprisoned. The harem had never been a prison, but a sacred space where all the family enjoyed everyday life, celebrated holidays and was engaged in various social activities. Richer women were busy with distributing charity and caring for orphans and the disabled. They hardly had time for gossip, and their strong faith in God and the education they had would never have let them act improperly.

The chapter dedicated to the imperial harem is marvelous. Whoever thinks of “dolce far niente” practiced by the harem women day after day should study it carefully. A reader will see that not a single creature in the imperial harem possibly could be accused of doing nothing. If one takes a walk in modern Istanbul, no matter what the route is, he/she will surely see a mosque, a public bath, a hospital, a market complex, a water-spring, or a school ordered to be built by a queen mother, or by a mother of a prince, or by any other high-ranked lady from the harem. For God’s sake when did they manage to do all these? Between gossiping and intriguing? Oh that’s a shame! There should be some Turkish coffee break in between…

Winning her rights back: court records

Imagine an Ottoman woman coming to the court to protect her rights.

An Ottoman woman appealing to an Ottoman court. Winning the case, having been restored in her rights. It is not simply “possible.” This was a real documented process clearly showing that a woman living in the Ottoman Empire should never be thought of as something between a nice pet and a piece of the home decor. For centuries she was free in her half of the house which was considered sacred.

Here I can give a lot of examples of what an Ottoman woman did in her life. And the reader acquainted with Oriental life and traditions only by means of pocket novels written in a month, read in a couple of days and forgotten forever, could think that this book is just another fantasy product attributing more freedom to the prisoners of the harem in order to gain more attention by female readers.

The truth is even more shocking. A creature considered indolent, depraved and exotic will sooner or later come to the court of civilization and appeal to get back her dignity and good name. Indeed she has all the evidence of what she really was – the author presents citing from the Ottoman court records as well as the opinion of Lucy M. Garnett who in 1909 wrote: “With regard to their legal status, Turkish women – already possess the legal, personal, and proprietary rights necessary to give them a social position equal, if not superior to that of European women generally.”

Design of the book

“The interior is as exciting and rich as the exterior. Images are beautifully reproduced be they photographs, drawings or old paintings.” (PMA review of the design of the book)

“Her beauty is of color rather than of line”, says Z. Duckett Ferriman. Design of this book is both of color and line. It is of luxury worthy of the Topkapý Palace. Graphical concept is deeply connected with the spirit of the book. Richness of colors and illustrations, selected with major taste and care, seem to reflect the position and respect an Ottoman woman enjoyed. The very notion of East has always been associated with luxury, mystery and wonderful colors that could hardly be seen in the West. This time this is not just a stereotype. That is why there are so many attractive definitions like “Oriental green,” “Turquoise,” “Glow of the Desert” used especially for goods closely related to style and fashion. The cover could be called royal green with semi-sweet coffee foam beige and wedding bracelet gold on it. Gentlemen in charge of art and graphic design did everything possible to turn this book into a real pearl of the harem – with textile details and paintings by Osman Hamdi, every page takes us to the world of women – beautiful, pure and splendidly decorated.

The book was highly appreciated by PMA for its perfect design. Everyone who will read it will be deeply impressed by the luxury of every single page, clarity of paintings, photographs and any other illustrations – each of them in its place, in total harmony with the message of the “Ottoman Women.”

Ottoman woman: year 2008

Finishing this review, I would like to express my sincere gratitude and admiration to the author, Asli Sancar Hanimefendi, for marvellously starring in two roles at the same time: one of them is that of an American-born lady writing fairly on Ottoman women (almost three hundred years after Lady Montague, one hundred and seventy after Miss Julia Pardoe and nearly a hundred years after Z. Duckett Ferriman), and the other is the role of a Turkish woman, member of the new society feeling respect and devotion to history and the truth. There is also a third one behind every line and in every color of this book.

An Ottoman woman in the court.

Presenting her book.

Calling for justice.

Valeria Kolos is a Ukrainian Turkish-English-Russian translator. Having graduated from the Oriental Studies Department of the Kyiv Shevchenko National University in 1999, she has been living in Istanbul for 6 years. V.Kolos has some publications (poems in Turkish) in several literature magazines.